Where would I be without Lifetime teens? I’d probably be either dead or in prison or in an unhappy polygamist marriage. Thanks, kids. More
Topic: Lifetime movies
The only way it could be more obvious what the movie’s about is if it were called Pregnant Amish or I’m An Amish Girl Who Had Sex With A Non-Amish Boy And Now I’m Carrying His Baby. Except it took way too long for the movie to get to that. More
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. I love Lifetime movies about teenagers. More
This is a movie about a girl who kills her daddy. So it would seem the title wasn’t just picked out of a hat. It is a bit misleading, though, since the girl doesn’t do the daddy-killing directly. She does, however, do it to the tune of the most literal soundtrack in Lifetime movie history. More
I spent most of the movie going “Ick, no,” which I’d say is a mark of success for a movie with this subject matter. And most importantly, Mr. Goldwyn was very good at being a creeper. More
Unfortunately, despite the TV-MA rating and the constant reminders that “viewer discretion is advised,” this movie was one of the least sexy things I’ve ever watched. The package of cheese crackers I ate while watching was more arousing. I’m guessing that it was rated MA simply because they use the word “panties” more than once. And I agree, that word should always come with a warning. More
Last night I watched Lifetime movie Petals on the Wind, and now I need an adult. More
Lifetime movies love to throw a twist at you. They love it almost as much as they love single moms, parking garages and the age 17. More
Last night Lifetime aired Return to Zero, a movie unlike anything I’ve ever watched on the network before, and I found it really refreshing. It would have been more fun to watch, and definitely more fun to write about, had it been a campfest full of twists and turns, but I have to give the network credit for showing something different. More
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Sometimes I watch a Lifetime movie and halfway through I figure out exactly where it’s going. And I of course feel extremely proud and mock Lifetime from my couch, probably through a mouthful of food, for being so transparent. But I really shouldn’t get so cocky, because other times a twist comes as a total shock to me even though it was pretty obvious looking back on it. More
Last night’s Lifetime movie A Daughter’s Nightmare wasn’t as entertaining as its predecessors A Mother’s Nightmare and A Sister’s Nightmare, but it kept my attention for the simple fact that I wanted to see how long it would take the characters to realize the movie’s huge creeper was just that — a huge creeper. More
Last night’s Lifetime movie Starving in Suburbia examined eating disorders. Because this is Lifetime, though, just looking at eating disorders wouldn’t cut it, so the movie also looked at the dangers of the Internet as it relates to eating disorders. And they also got an alliterative suburbia-related title in there, to make sure they have something to show on marathon days right after Sexting in Suburbia, although this one had a much more intense tone. That’s putting it rather lightly. More
Guys, I finally discovered the worst Lifetime movie to ever play out in front of my eyeballs, and it’s called A Day Late and a Dollar Short. More
I had high hopes for Death Clique to break the recent trend of boring and/or annoying Lifetime movies. It has “death” in the title, for one, which is never a bad sign (except for the characters). But most importantly, it’s about teenagers. More