Topic: Jionni Lavalle

Jersey Shore Field Notes: The Pregnancy Scare

Jersey Shore Field Notes: The Pregnancy Scare

(By an anthropologist)

0:00 – Our specimens emerge hungover for the 11th time this week. Deena, Pauly and Ronnie head to the pizzeria for a day of work.

1:00 – Snooki wakes in her pink leopard-print (endangered species) dress from the night before and tries to track down her mate, Jionni, who abandoned her in a fit of rage.

2:00 – Snooki wants to talk to JWOWW, but JWOWW’s asleep. (Diagnosis: adaptive defense mechanism.) So Snooki puts on her furry boots (soon-to-be-extinct species, hopefully) and heads out alone. More »

Jersey Shore Field Notes: Jionni Is In The Building

Jersey Shore Field Notes: Jionni Is In The Building

(By an anthropologist)

0:00 – We see our specimen Snooki in the aftermath of her car accident. The cops have arrived quickly because the cops were in the car she hit.

0:30 – The cops give Snooki a breathalyzer test. She passes. (Analysis: Her alcohol level was so high it broke the breathalyzer and reset it to zero.)

1:00 – The cops drag Snooki into their van. She reads herself her own version of the Miranda Rights, which goes: “This sucks.” More »

Conspiracy Theory: Did MTV Engineer Snooki’s Breakup with Jionni LaValle?

Conspiracy Theory: Did MTV Engineer Snooki's Breakup with Jionni LaValle?

There are so many rumors coming from Italy about the upcoming season of Jersey Shore that I’m expecting either a colossal success or a humongous failure. Apparently, despite the fight between Ronnie Ortiz-Magro and The Situation and the fact that Ronnie is back on with Sammi Giancola, MTV’s producers still weren’t happy with the level of drama on the show.

Now, several outlets are reporting that Snooki broke up with her boyfriend Jionni LaValle while in Florence. But Crazy Days and Nights says that there’s more to the story than that. More »