If you watch this show mostly through the spaces between your fingers, you might need a pleasant reminder that this is all just make believe, and it’s being make-believed into glorious existence by some fun-loving, adorable people. More
Topic: Jessica Lange
It’s almost Halloween, time for witches and ghosts and demons, oh my! The supernatural may only be celebrated one day of the year, but at the Briarcliff Mental Institution, scene of American Horror Story: Asylum, the scary and seemingly inexplicable … More
After a first season many thought unbeatable in its multiplicity of bizarre story lines, American Horror Story may have outdone itself with Asylum. It was disturbing, crowded, and absolutely insane. But all good things must come to an end. (And some bad things too, like Adam Levine‘s microphone hand.) Let’s begin. More
If seeing Jessica Lange as a mental patient with bad hair and boxy clothes made you feel sad this past season of American Horror Story, weep no more. The next season will be “really about female power” and will feature Jessica Lange restored to her full, glamorous state. More
As the Asylum season of American Horror Story draws to a close, we get to follow some of Briarcliff’s inmates outside those loathsome walls to see what kind of lives they’ve built for themselves in the real world. Unfortunately, you can never really leave Briarcliff; once you’ve picked up that baggage, it will follow you wherever you go, infecting others as well. Luckily, there are still many moments of comic relief to cheer you up. More
Another week, another ridiculous and amazing episode of American Horror Story. I’ve finally struck the “unintentionally” from the title of these recaps, as I’ve come to believe there’s nothing unintentional about this show. From the homages to various horror movies to the cringeworthy porno dialogue, THEY MEANT TO DO THAT. More
It’s come to a point where American Horror Story has demonstrated so many glimmers of brilliance that I feel bad calling its moments of hilarity “unintentional.” This show is totally aware of how ridiculous it is! And yet, something about the title just works. So I will continue with this week’s episode, with the caveat that I now unabashedly love/fear this show like nothing else. More
Last night, American Horror Story found me in a position of vulnerability. I had a fever, and I watched it right before bed and yes, I’ll admit it gave me some very sweaty nightmares, which it obviously had been wanting to do very badly since I first started mocking it on the internet. But as with most of life’s horrors, I have no choice but to continue laughing, lest I start to cry. More
American Horror Story has officially ruined Christmas. I saw it coming, but there was nothing I could do, and now Christmas is more ruined than I ever thought possible. How did it accomplish such a feat? With a Santa-esque murderer, a nightmare tree, and a possessed nun, of course. Let’s begin. More
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Last night’s American Horror Story was, once again, pretty fucking scary. The idea of a person being held against their will and subjected to all sorts of invasive operations and non-consensual “therapies” is one of the worst things I can imagine. Luckily there’s still a lot of hokey supernatural shit and groaner lines to provide the comic relief. Let’s begin! More
You win, American Horror Story. I am officially scared by you. You do horrible things to innocent people that I would not want to see done to guilty people. You tease me by casting Zachary Quinto and his nice face, and then have him turn out to not be nice at all. You paint quite a dark picture of mental healthcare in the 1960s. And then there’s the Nazi stuff…Jesus Christ! Nevertheless, there were still a few parts of last night’s episode that gave me the giggles. Let’s begin. More
American Horror Story is quickly morphing from something I begrudgingly watch for work, to something I begrudgingly watch because I need to see what happens to the characters. Nympho Chloe Sevigny, Lesbian Reporter, Obviously Framed Murderer, Giant Lips Nun (as played by Jessica Lange)…I feel like I know them all! And so, without further ado, I give you: the ten most unintentionally hilarious parts of last night’s American Horror Story. More
Last night, the new season of American Horror Story premiered with a star-studded bang just in time for Halloweeeeen. It was a regular clusterfuck of familiar faces, and some moments were genuinely scary. However, I’m afraid there were far more “oofs” in the hour-long premiere than “eeks,” so I’m rounding up the ten most unintentionally hilarious moments. Spoilers ahead! More
Did you catch the Golden Globe Awards last night? I was able to watch most of it before I conked out. Here are a few photos of the gorgeous dresses from the show; I’ll be posting more as they come … More