Guys, if you ever want to have a wedding of your own that’s aesthetically satisfying to you, don’t watch the video of Jessica Simpson‘s wedding. Just don’t do it, because it will forever raise the bar to impossible heights. Trust me. More
Topic: Eric Johnson
Jessica Simpson finally married Eric Johnson this past Saturday after having fifteen children with him out of wedlock. Wait, what’s that? They only have two? How is that possible when she so clearly doesn’t know what birth control is? More
I know you woke up this morning before your alarm went off in a cold sweat, heart racing, worried that you would never in your lifetime get to watch a video of Jessica Simpson hobbling drunkenly into and out of a nightclub. But I’m happy to inform you that there’s nothing to worry about, because TMZ has answered your hopes and dreams and prayers by releasing that exact video. More
Now that Jessica has given birth to her son Ace Knute Johnson, everybody’s waiting on the edge of their seats to hear more about him. So it was oh so exciting over the weekend when Jessica tweeted a picture with the message “Eric got carried away with his swaddling skills.” This must be a photo of little Ace wrapped snug as a bug in a blanket decorated with the playing cards that inspired his name! Let’s open the photo and take a looksy. More
With all the hub-bub coming from North West’s nursery and Kate Middleton’s womb, I almost forgot that Jessica Simpson was also on our due-any-day-now list. More
Jessica is planning to finally marry Eric Johnson, the father of her children, soon after her baby boy (I remember it’s a boy because she talked about wieners and I was scarred for life) is born. It’s been over two years since Eric proposed, but those darned pregnancies kept getting in the way of their nuptials. More
Jessica Simpson accidentally revealed the sex of her baby last night on Jimmy Kimmel Live by eloquently saying that she “never knew a wiener could make me nauseous.” Which I’m pretty sure means she’s having a boy. Or a hot dog. More
Jessica Simpson announced she’s pregnant again, and continues to make a career out of doing things most regular people do only with slightly bigger breasts. More
Jessica Simpson might have a lot on her plate right now, with Papa Joe Simpson allegedly preferring the company of young, blonde him-bos and all, but it seems like the one thing she doesn’t have on her plate these days is actual food. More
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After what seemed like 87 months of gestation, former singer and current Fashion Star judge Jessica Simpson gave birth to Maxwell Drew Johnson this morning. More
After the misleading Jessica Simpson Baby headlines in Ok Magazine a few weeks ago, I thought we all agreed that pretending like Jessica Simpson already gave birth to sell magazines was probably a little unethical. More
Hairstylist Ken Paves says that his star client Jessica Simpson is “so happy” right now in the weeks before she gives birth. Yeah, if I had magazines asking me endless questions about pregnancy and fighting for the scoop over my long-awaited birth, I’d be pretty content, too. More
As if her announcement yesterday about loving pregnant sex wasn’t enough to get you all hot and bothered, today she announced what she’s naming her daughter. More
Nick Lachey might’ve gotten remarried first, but if the rumors and “reports” are true, then Jessica Simpson beat her ex to something else: Multiple outlets say that the singer and one-time Newlyweds star might be expecting her first child. More