Topic: e!

Bridalplasty Recap: The Final RealBride

Bridalplasty Recap: The Final RealBride

(We missed recapping last week’s episode of Bridalplasty, SyFy’s* show about the hunt for the perfectly plastic RealDoll bride, because we were on a rocketship to Sundance. But both Cheyenne and Dominique were eliminated and sent straight to the recycling plant, leaving just Allyson and Jenessa in the house.)

As the ep begins, Allyson is still reeling from her decision to keep Princess Jenessa around over Dominique, which she did because the producers implanted a chip in her brain that gives her the ability to understand what would be better for the ratings. Allyson wanders around the house in a shirt that says “Ballbuster” and thinks about how great it will be when she beats her nemesis to become a 100% plastic sex toy. More »

Bridalplasty Recap: Let Them Spit Out Cake

Bridalplasty Recap: Let Them Spit Out Cake

This week’s episode of SyFy’s* Bridalplasty is all about synching up the brides’ neurons so that that they’re always right about unimportant matters like wine and crab meat, but never right about important matters like niceness and which words are actually part of the English language. First up, hosty Shanna Moakler takes the gals to visit the showroom of a man named Patrick Hanson, whose claim to fame is that he’s LA’s premiere cake designer and also that his veins pump fondant instead of blood. Here, the women taste the difference between a Hanson’s cake and a regular cake, which is so offensive to the brides’ palates that they gag on the tiny morsels and drool all over their little plastic faces. Sugarhigh, the girls talk about their dream wedding cakes in very bubbly voices. Melissa, for example, wants a cake that contains edible pearls and also Zoloft. More »