Surprise! We mentioned a few days ago that David Arquette‘s meltdown had achieved Oompa Loompa level. And now he’s in rehab.
If there were a scale of things that surprised us, this would rank right below the fact it is cold in January. However, David has thrown a bit of a curve ball into the works. He is apparently going to rehab in efforts to win wife Courteney Cox back. Um… good effort, but maybe a little late on that one, Dave? More
New Year’s resolutions can be hard to keep. Drink less? Smoke less? Eat less? It’s hard to know when you’re engaged in a little healthy cheating and just falling into a black hole. But here’s a little something to keep you motivated as 2011 progresses. Whatever you do, chances are you’re going to want to avoid following David Arquette into the world of the oompa loompa bachelor. More
David Arquette is in a bit of a tailspin since his split from wife Courtney Cox. And continuing to go on Howard Stern is not HELPING. This week, he told Stern that he wants to get started with some Hollywood royalty inbreeding. Why does that sound like a good idea? Because he and Drew Barrymore would make totally awesome babies! Um…
“I know she is with Justin Long and everything, but how cool would an Arquette-Barrymore child be?… From a pure breeding standpoint.”
Courtney Cox is Laughing Her Ass Of Right Now – Ever wanted to see the failed David Arquette pilot, D.I.R.T.? Of course you did, it involves the Scream 4 actor dressed as a giant squirrel. (Vulture)
What is it about David Arquette that just seems to ooze desperation? I’ll admit, I had a weird sort of crush on him when he was the doofy Deputy Andy in Scream, but then came those string of AT&T commercials, and that weird movie where he was a Spanish wrestler? Oh, wasn’t there also a movie that was like a second-rate Arachnophobia? Basically, being married to Courtney Cox was the only thing keeping David from teetering over the edge of clown-town to join his pals Carrot Top and Andy Dick. More
• Harry Potter tools that can help with dating. Invisibility cloak! (YourTango)
• Oh good: the teacher who started dating one of her students in Texas is now pregnant. Does that mean she won’t get the death penalty. (ABC News)
• Hey Facebook users, do NOT click any links saying Justin Bieber Gets A Boner, as it is an outside app that will probably enroll you in NAMBLA. (Buzzfeed) More
When I was 13, I had a Scream 2 poster above my bed. Why Scream 2 and not the original? God knows. I also had the soundtrack, which most notably featured David Arquette screaming a cover of “I Think I Love You” but for some reason Wikipedia is no saying that was Less Than Jake singing? I swear to god David Arquette was on the soundtrack. ANYWHOOZLE: Scream 4 trailer! More
Courteney Cox isn’t divorcing David Arquette - “I don’t know what will happen, but this is not like we’re getting divorced. This is a separation and I think that takes a lot of courage.” We’re sure all the media attention is helping matters plenty. (Celebuzz)
Patricia Arquette accompanied her brother David to the Onexone Gala in New York City this week, and apparently she does not share her brother’s penchant for oversharing. David was more than happy to tell Howard Stern all the gritty details of his divorce from Courteney Cox, but when reporters asked Patricia about the split, she threw a temper tantrum. Apparently, asking about her brother’s love life is like asking if she masturbates. It sounds like the Arquettes have some family ish when it comes to marital matters.
According to US Weekly, this was Patricia’s response to questions about the divorce:
“How are you doing? How is your kid doing? Have you ever had anything happen in your life? What’s the worst thing that you’ve ever had happen to you? Do you ever masturbate? Have you ever had an abortion? I mean, can you imagine these kind of questions? Can you imagine? Can you imagine? It’s not alright! It’s not alright!”
Last night at Spike TV’s Scream Awards, I’m pretty sure True Blood won everything. But maybe that’s because I only follow fictional characters of the HBO show on my Twitter account (sometimes they tweet back!). But between Alan Ball winning some award and Eric Skarsgard winning another, Wes Craven hopped on stage with a recently divorced David Arquette, Neve Campbell, and some blond chick that may or may not have been Emma Roberts to premiere the first trailer from Scream 4. More
The world may not be ready to accept her show about cougars, but Courteney Cox‘s divorce may prove that cougars are moving up in the world. As the details of her separation from husband David Arquette have come out this week, Courteney is clearly emerging as the victor in the split. She’s already dating a much younger man, her show is finally a hit and she appears to be winning the PR battle (mostly for not dishing to Howard Stern like her husband did).
Hollywood divorces may often find women being left by successful men for younger, hotter women, but here the roles seem reversed. It’s especially interesting considering the fact that she currently stars in a show called Cougar Town - that’s not actually about cougars. If anything, Courteney may become the new face of cougars, and not for playing one on TV. More
David Arquette is feeling guilty for talking about cheating on Howard Stern‘s radio show. But he’s kind of making it worse by tweeting about it. (Mirror)
But that’s ok. Because Courteney Cox isn’t just leaving him. She’s supposedly “in love” with her costar from Cougar Town. (Radar)
Twilight star Kellan Lutz may be dating 90210‘s AnnaLynne McCord, but that’s not going to stop him from acquiring a harem of hot ladies while he’s out at night. (NYDN)
Gavin Rosdale recently admitted to a gay affair in the 80s. And his British gender bending popstar lover Marilyn says that Gavin was the love of his life. (InTouch) More
Lindsay Lohan reportedly tried to escape from the Betty Ford Center this week, because she desperately needed coke….acola. Zing Radar!
Meanwhile, it’s hard to feel bad for someone who has punched Lindsay Lohan in the face, but Jasmine Waltz says she was blindsided by David Arquette outing her as his mistress. (Radar)
No worries for Courteney Cox tho. “Cougar Hunt” has apparently offered her $1 million to become the face of its dating site. (TMZ)
And another tale of woe to add to Celebrity Divorce Week. Jessalyn Gelsig, who divorced Mr. Shue on Glee last season, is getting separated in real life as well. (WhyFame) More
Courteney Cox and David Arquette are separating after 11 years of marriage. Courteney’s supposedly been shacking up with her Cougartown costar co-star Brian Van Holt. (Radar)
…Or it might be because David’s seeing Jasmine Waltz, a girl best known for punching Lindsay Lohan on her birthday a few months ago. (TMZ)
In other former Friends news, David Schwimmer secretly married a 25 year old in June. (EW)
Minka Kelly‘s mom was a stripper. And would wake her up at 4a for grocery runs. This was supposedly fun. But it sounds sad to us… (Esquire) More