It was just two weeks ago that news first leaked that Jennifer Lawrence and Chris Martin were dating, and already J-Law is supposedly planning on going on tour with him? HERE’S YOUR HAT WHAT’S YOUR HURRY? More
The saga of Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin’s “conscious uncoupling” just gets weirder and weirder by the day. More
I just want to make sure — I didn’t accidentally fall through a time warp into a time when Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin are still happily married, right? Because that’s the only explanation that makes sense for why Gwyneth would have nominated Chris for the ALS ice bucket challenge. More
Were they created from some celebrity couples mad libs game with blanks reading “30-something divorcee” and “20-something it girl”? Hmm, that sounds like a fun game, actually. Let’s play it and create a few other celebrity couples just as random as this one. More
I’ve had all weekend to get used to the rumored relationship between Chris Martin and Jennifer Lawrence, and so far the only part I fully understand is that the couple name ‘Martin Lawrence’ is the best thing that has ever happened. More
Chris Martin has officially ended his time as a vegetarian and has begun eating meat again, surely to make his soon-to-be ex-wife, Gwyneth Paltrow, seethe with rage. More
Even I need to apologize for the messiness of the divorce that I’m going to dive into. It’s the one between Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin, and it just got really down and dirty — Chris let the kids have fast food. GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. More
There are a lot of things that Chris Martin will take responsibility for, but he has to draw the line somewhere, okay? Which is why, even as he’s saying that the divorce from Gwyneth Paltrow is his fault, he still won’t take the blame for coming up with that ridiculous euphemism for their breakup — ‘conscious uncoupling’. More
There was a second there where I really wanted to sympathize with Gwyneth Paltrow over the end of her marriage to Chris Martin. But then I saw that she’d very pretentiously labeled their divorce as a ‘conscious uncoupling’ in her written statement, and that was all out the window. More
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In news that will upset gluten-eaters and non-gluten-eaters around the world, Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin have announced via Goop that they’re separating. While their announcement included all the usual “we’ve decided to part ways because being in the same room makes us … More
In a stunning display of being so famous that ordinary activities become extraordinary, Jay Z and his entourage took the Tube to their concert at the O2 Arena in London and everybody freaked. the eff. out. More
Self-appointed food expert of the century, Gwyneth Paltrow, took a quick break from gaining charisma points by talking to herself in a mirror to write a cookbook titled, Oh Please, Do Go Ahead and Feed Your Children, But Don’t Come Running to me When They’re Little Tubs of Lard. P.S You Disgust Me! More
Noted fashionable iceberg Gwyneth Paltrow melted the tippy tops of her polar ice caps on New Years Eve, and busted out what can only be referred to as mom-dancing onstage at Jay-Z and Chris Martin‘s show. More
When Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin named their baby Apple, it made headlines. “Why that’s not a name, that’s a fruit!” we all exclaimed. However now, 7 years later, we see apples in the grocery store and think to ourselves, “how funny to name a fruit after a celebrity child!” More