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At this early stage in The Bachelorette, there are still so many guys for Emily Maynard to get to know any of them in-depth…let alone the viewers. It’s a portion of the competition that I’ll refer to as ‘The Man Pageant’. So why not let me help you out with remembering? More
My helpful cheat sheet on last night’s premiere of The Bachelorette that gets you updated on Emily Maynard, the crazy things the guys are doing to make a first impression, and my six chosen front-runners. Stay up-to-date with me this season to see if I’m right. More
Who will you trust with your Oscars red carpet pre-show this Sunday? Seasoned professionals (who still put their feet in their mouth) like Giuliana Rancic and Ryan Seacrest? The Twitterverse? Tim Gunn trying his hand at gushing over gowns? Check out your choices and what each one says about you. More
It’s the finale of The Bachelorette! After weeks of watching Ashley Hebert humiliate herself on live TV and eventually winnow a group of guys down to some pretty cute ones, last night’s 33 hour finale episode finally brought an end to the season. In case you forgot, we’re down to two gentlemen – Ben “Beneff” F and JP. In the preview clip, there are roughly 27 “amazing”s, 41 “put myself out there”s and 99 “connection”s. More
Fiji Time! Not only is Fiji my favorite kind of bottled water, it’s my favorite location on The Bachelorette so far, because it means we’re down to three guys, which means this season is almost over. Ashley gives the obligatory Fiji Tourism Voiceover Ad at the beginning of the episode, followed by the inevitable recap of the whole season. You know, these episodes would only be 20 minutes long if you took out all the parts where they recap a) previous episodes and b) current episodes. More
One thing about The Bachelor and The Bachelorette is that they’re ostensibly about finding love but are more about finding hookups. As a result, the show loves to trot out the few remaining successful couples. This week, we revisited last season’s Bachelorette, Ali Fedotowsky, and her fiance Roberto Martinez. They’re here to remind us that the show works for some people and do some damage control for Ashley. More
We’re down to four guys, which means it’s time for hometown dates. In case you forgot who the four remaining guys were, Ashley reminds us about Beneff, Constantine, Ames, and JP. I have to say – Ashley did a good job choosing her final four. They’re not all going to be on the cover of Men’s Health next week, but they’re all nice and sweet and capable of using adverbs properly. More
Did you hear that Emily Maynard and Brad Womack broke up? If you missed it being on the cover of every magazine ever, host Chris Harrison is here to catch you up to speed. (Dear Chris’ Voiceover, Emily and Brad’s proposal was not the most dramatic ones ever.) Chris says that Emily and Brad had a hard time dealing with tabloid rumors and the paparazzi, which I could sort of buy if Emily hadn’t sold a giant cover interview in People magazine. Chris says that Emily is here to “help us understand” what happened. More
It’s down to six guys! That’s awesome for two reasons: one, it’s easier to remember who the heck all these people are, and two, it means we’re one episode closer to this show being over. The gang heads to Taiwan and the guys are being driven around in some bus. 2011 is the hundredth anniversary of Taiwan, which is actually somewhat interesting and I can’t believe it made it onto the show. Chris Harrison announces that there will be four dates – three one-on-ones and a group date. After this, two guys get booted and they have hometown dates. More
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In most of my recaps of The Bachelorette this season, I’ve complained about the interminable Bentley subplot and the fact that the producers want to make Ashley Hebert look as sad and needy as possible. But there are a couple of great things about the show this year, such as: More
Last season’s Bachelor couple, Emily Maynard and Brad Womack, have been slowly breaking up for months, possibly because contractual obligations required them to keep it a secret. But now that it’s officially over, ABC has announced that Emily will tell her side of the story in a sitdown interview with Chris Harrison that will air after next week’s episode of The Bachelorette. More
ABC’s grand experiment in humiliating Ashley Hebert continues on another week. In case you missed the 1,200 other recaps, the episode opens with a quick recap of the Bentley situation. Ashley voiceovers about this week’s location, Hong Kong, but she segues into talking about Bentley and that godforsaken dot dot dot again. In case you didn’t catch the foreshadowing, Bentley is going to be in this episode. Bentley! Bentley. More
We start off the episode with even more recapping of Why Bentley Sucks, the new Bachelorette spinoff. If I have to watch him and Ashley say “dot dot dot” one more time, I might put my arm through the television. Which would be stupid, since I watch this show on the computer. The show would only be fifteen minutes long if they cut out all the segments that recap things that just happened, but I guess they’d make a lot less money from ad sales that way. This week, we’re off to Chang Mai, Thailand. More
This show is two hours long every week. TWO HOURS, people. I get the season finale being two hours long, but this shit is interminable. It could be an hour if they cut out all the unecessary recapping of everything five minutes after it happened, because it is majorly depressing watching Ashley cry again after she was humiliated last week. This week, the gang is off to Thailand, because it is worth humiliating yourself on national TV in order to get a free trip to Phuket. Because this is The Bachelorette, they make sure to illustrate Thailand by showing pictures of monkeys and elephants and playing the “Asian Music” button on their Casio keyboard. More
