Topic: Ashley Hebert

Love Lessons from ‘The Bachelorette’: Shut Up and Kiss Her Already

Love Lessons from 'The Bachelorette': Shut Up and Kiss Her Already

This show is two hours long every week. TWO HOURS, people. I get the season finale being two hours long, but this shit is interminable. It could be an hour if they cut out all the unecessary recapping of everything five minutes after it happened, because it is majorly depressing watching Ashley cry again after she was humiliated last week. This week, the gang is off to Thailand, because it is worth humiliating yourself on national TV in order to get a free trip to Phuket. Because this is The Bachelorette, they make sure to illustrate Thailand by showing pictures of monkeys and elephants and playing the “Asian Music” button on their Casio keyboard. More »

A Deleted Scene from ‘The Bachelorette’ Makes Ashley Hebert Almost Funny

A Deleted Scene from 'The Bachelorette' Makes Ashley Hebert Almost Funny

ABC has posted a deleted scene from this week’s episode of The Bachelorette online. The scene shows Ashley Hebert getting a chance to roast the Bachelors – my favorite burn is one she gets in on Bentley, saying that his name should actually be ” ’76 Dodge Dart.” While it’s likely that Jeff Ross or another comic helped Ashley write the jokes, her delivery’s not bad. So why didn’t this minute-long scene make it into Monday’s two hour-long episode? Probably because it didn’t fit into the episode’s “Ashley Is a Saddy McSadderson” storyline. More »

Is Trishelle Cannatella Lobbying to Be the Next ‘Bachelorette’?

Is Trishelle Cannatella Lobbying to Be the Next 'Bachelorette'?

Former Real World: Las Vegas cast member Trishelle Cannatella evidently doesn’t like Ashley Hebert. Last night, she tweeted “Note to #thebachelorette and @abc next time pick a hot new girl and not the girl who wears reading glasses & cries a lot.” I’m assuming that’s a burn on Bachelorette Ashley, who spent a lot of last night’s episode crying about boys and one scene wearing her glasses. Crying is a huge point of this show, and I’d bet money that every Bachelor/ette is required by contract to cry several times during the season so the show has dramatic tension and an excuse to use that overbearing piano music, so I don’t think ABC will ever cast a non-crier. More »

Love Lessons from ‘The Bachelorette’: Taking Off the Mask Still Won’t Help You

Love Lessons from 'The Bachelorette': Taking Off the Mask Still Won't Help You

This show is determined to destroy me. I get the two hour running length for the premiere – where we’re introduced to fifty people, half of whom disappear – or the finale, but every single episode is running two hours, and it’s killing me. As Tara Ariano puts it, “Metastasizing reality shows: it’s a real problem.” So if The Bachelorette is the Bataan death march of reality television, then I need to start walking.

Dance is the language of love. Well, that and the word “amazing.” More »

Former ‘Bachelorette’ Ali Fedotowsky Thinks JP Is Going to Win Ashley Hebert’s Heart

Former 'Bachelorette' Ali Fedotowsky Thinks JP Is Going to Win Ashley Hebert's Heart

The most recent Bachelorette, Ali Fedotowsky, is staying true to the show that made her a star. She has been watching Ashley Hebert‘s season of The Bachelorette and, although it’s early, she already has her eye on a winner: JP. Ali tweeted, “Calling it now – JP wins. It was SO clear in their rose ceremony interaction.” She added the hashtag “Reminded me of my time with Roberto,” a reference to her fiance (and final rose recipient) Roberto Martinez. More »

Spoiler Alert: Blogger Reality Steve Identifies The Final Four on ‘The Bachelorette’

Spoiler Alert: Blogger Reality Steve Identifies The Final Four on 'The Bachelorette'

Well, that was quick. Blogger “Reality Steve,” aka Steve Carbone has made a name for himself spoiling The Bachelor and The Bachelorette. He gained infamy as the person who spoiled the Jason/Melissa/Molly surprise ending, and now he lives to poke ABC. On his blog, he posted the final four from Ashley Hebert‘s season of The Bachelorette. Click through it you want to know who they are. More »

Love Lessons from ‘The Bachelorette’: Love Means Never Having To Say You’re Sorry for Passing Out Drunk

Love Lessons from 'The Bachelorette': Love Means Never Having To Say You're Sorry for Passing Out Drunk

Aaaaand we’re back. The seventh season of The Bachelorette kicked off last night, and there was a nice mix of the familiar and the absurd. And there was a guy named Bentley who, despite being much older than Teen Mom Maci Bookout, is probably named after her kid. And he has a kid of his own, whose name is Cozy. Wait, maybe he and Maci should date!

Wait, what was I saying? Oh yeah, The Bachelorette. This show destroys me. Seriously, I watch The Real World/Road Rules Challenge, and I enjoy it more than listening to the people on this show blather about love and then break up six weeks later. So let’s just get into it, shall we? More »

Meet the Crazy-Eyed and Awkwardly Styled Dudes from This Season of ‘The Bachelorette’

Meet the Crazy-Eyed and Awkwardly Styled Dudes from This Season of 'The Bachelorette'

The next season of The Bachelorette, starring Brad Womack reject Ashley Hebert, kicks off on Monday. So to get yourself excited about the show – or to get prepped for the inevitable trainwreck – we’ve selected some of the dudes we think have the potential to either go all the way or do something so crazy it makes great TV. Good luck finding a fiance, Ashley! More »

Video: The New ‘Bachelorette’ Preview Fails to Make Ashley Hebert Interesting

Video: The New 'Bachelorette' Preview Fails to Make Ashley Hebert Interesting

The new season of The Bachelorette, starring Brad Womack castoff Ashley Hebert, premieres on May 30. The first official preview video is out now, and it somehow manages to make Ashley seem even more boring than she was during her stint on The Bachelor. Ashley seems like a sweet enough girl, but she’s too reserved to be a good Bachelorette. Also, I’m still bummed that Chantal O’Brien said no to the show, although that just makes me like her more. More »

Crushable Quotable: ‘Bachelor’ Producer Confirms the Show Will Always Be About White People

Crushable Quotable: 'Bachelor' Producer Confirms the Show Will Always Be About White People

Last week after the dull finale to the second Brad Womack season of The Bachelor, I suggested a couple of ways to improve the show. Among them: get a Bachelor or Bachelorette of color. However, show creator/producer Mike Fleiss said in a recent interview that he intends to keep the show full of white people. Fleiss told Entertainment Weekly, “We always want to cast for ethnic diversity. It’s just that for whatever reason, they [non-white people?] don’t come forward. I wish they would.” More »