If you’re a fan of cheesy things, there’s a good chance you’ve seen or at least heard of the 1996 TV movie Mother, May I Sleep With Danger?, starring Tori Spelling as a teenage girl with an obsessive boyfriend. It originally aired on NBC but is thought of by many as a Lifetime movie, both because it has aired on the network in years since and because, well, it’s about a teenage girl with an obsessive boyfriend. That’s Lifetime in a nutshell.
The movie has become so associated with Lifetime that the network is actually planning a remake for next year to mark the movie’s 20th anniversary. But wait! There’s more! According to The Hollywood Reporter, James Franco wrote the story for the updated version. Yes, that’s James Franco the weird actor, not some other guy named James Franco who writes stories for remakes of classic TV movies. James will also executive produce the project, but there (thankfully) doesn’t seem to be any indication as of now that he’ll be starring in it.
I don’t have the highest expectations for this, and it’s not just because James Franco is involved, although that doesn’t exactly improve matters. I was already disappointed by Lifetime’s most recent attempt at self-awareness, A Deadly Adoption. (No, I’m still not over it, and I never will be.) This project sounds even more pointless than that one, because at least A Deadly Adoption was a (somewhat) original story.
What is the point of remaking a movie that’s already hilariously bad on its own? Does Lifetime think they’re somehow going to make it hilariously worse? The joy of a movie like Mother, May I Sleep With Danger? is how unintentionally hilarious it was. Once you add intentional hilarity into the mix, it just ruins things. If I want to laugh at a cheesy made-for-TV movie with bad acting, I’ll just watch the original. Without James Franco.