If you asked me which celebrity child I thought was most likely to have a Home Alone experience before puberty, my answer would always be North West. And she almost had one in Paris this week, by the looks of this new video of Kim Kardashian leaving her hotel after Fashion Week. It sure does look a lot like Kim was about to get into her car and head to the airport before remembering that, oh yeah, she has a child, and then going back inside to retrieve her.
Kim struts out of the building and heads to her car, where she removes her coat as if she’s about to climb in. But then she turns around to go back inside, and when she comes back out again, the coat is back on and she’s carrying a frowny North. I imagine North’s internal monologue went a little something like this:
“Curse you, woman! I was almost finished fashioning a rope out of bedsheets so I could rappel down the side of the building and take on a new identity as a French baby named Nord Ouest. I was going to get a job making baguettes and spend my evenings gazing at the Eiffel Tower and maybe take up smoking. Foiled again!”
Perhaps Kim was distracted by making sure the holes in her outfit looked Swiss cheesy enough, or maybe that tackle from Vitalii Sediuk dislodged the portion of her brain that remembers she has a baby. Haha, just kidding. She never had that part of her brain in the first place.
To be fair (I hate being fair when Kim K is involved, harrumph), Kim doesn’t declare “I forgot my baby!” or ask “Where’s North?” And there are a few cuts in the video that I suppose could provide an explanation that doesn’t make her look like a terrible mother. I’m sure she’ll tell us what really happened very soon. Either that or Kanye will rant about it. Maybe Kim should invest in a compass. Get it? Because compasses point to North? I slay myself.