Yesterday we responded to the reports that Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon are ending their marriage by saying how surprising it was that they lasted this long in the first place. I mean, they got married after six weeks together and lasted six years! That’s so much longer than anyone predicted (except maybe them).
Hollywood relationships are notoriously short-lived, but there are always those particular ones that you really don’t think will last. Whereas you might give most Hollywood marriages five years, you give these a few months. We keep expecting these couples to join Mariah and Nick in Splitsville, but they somehow are still together. What is going on?!
1. Kim Kardashian and Kanye West
Kim K doesn’t exactly have a great track record when it comes to marriage. Her marriage to Kris Humphries wasn’t even her first one, and it only lasted an infamous 72 days. Yet she and Kanye have already passed that number. What’s taking you too so long? Is it because you have a kid together? That’s no excuse. Get to divorcing.
2. Kaley Cuoco and Ryan Sweeting
(Photo: Brian To / WENN.com)
Kaley and Ryan rushed into an engagement after only a few months of dating (that happened to overlap with her “relationship” with Henry Cavill), and they got married not long after that. This, coupled with the fact that they got couples tattoos (CURSE!), made us think they wouldn’t last very long, but they’ve been together since New Year’s.
3. Jessica Biel and Justin Timberlake
(Photo: Joel Ginsburg / WENN.com)
Do these two even know they’re married? When was the last time you saw them in the same place at the same time? I certainly can’t remember. And yet, as far as we know, they’re still together. And they have been for almost two years. They look like they have so much fun together, don’t they?
4. LeAnn Rimes and Eddie Cibrian
Ugh, these two. They got together by having an affair, which they continue to talk about and act disgustingly proud of every single moment of their lives. So it would be the perfect karma for them to break up almost immediately, preferably with one of them cheating on the other one. And yet they’re still together after three years of marriage. UGH.
5. Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott
(Photo: Josiah True / WENN.com)
How many scandals have these two been through? How many children to they have? How many reality shows have they starred on? They’ve crossed everything off their bucket list. Now where’s the divorce? If you can believe it, it’s been eight whole years. That’s like a century in celebrity years.
6. Desiree Hartsock and Chris Siegfried from The Bachelorette
(Image: Gaz Shirley / PacificCoastNews.com)
Here’s an interesting case. Desiree’s first choice was Brooks Forester, but he chose to leave the show. So, according to her brother and everyone else in the universe, she settled for Chris. Doesn’t seem like something that would last, right? Well, apparently we’re wrong, because they’re still engaged. Of course, it’s been over a year now, but Desiree just had her bridal shower, and they’re planning for a January wedding. Really, guys? You sure about that?
7. Charlize Theron and Sean Penn
(Photo: Rob Rich / WENN.com)
We mostly predicted this one to end quickly as wishful thinking, because we just couldn’t imagine that Charlize would choose to stay with scumbag Sean. And yet they’ve been dating for months now. Ugh. Just stop.
8. Jennifer Aniston and Justin Theroux
(Photo: Ivan Nikolov / WENN.com)
WHAT ARE YOU TWO DOING?! You’ve been engaged for two whole years. Brangelina are alive and well and seem very happy together, contrary to what that psychic says, so if you’re waiting for them to break up then you might want to rethink things. JUST GET MARRIED ALREADY.
9. Suki Waterhouse and Bradley Cooper
Considering we’ve been convinced this is a PR relationship from the start, it’s pretty weird that they’re still together. Our first post about them was in March 2013. You guys can stop it now. This is sufficient.