Full HouseÂ served a very particular purpose in our lives. There was a family, the family would get mixed up in hijinks, a lesson would be learned, and everyone would celebrate with ice cream and pet the dog. We in turn learned that while things can go wrong, there will always be a family who loves you to help you find your way. We now live in a world whereÂ Full House is no longer safe.Â Sad Full House has set out to ruin any happy memories you have of the show buy reducing it to 30 seconds of the most depressing moment…and it’s kind of amazing.
Sad Full HouseÂ comes from the funny and twisted mind of YouTuber BenjaminApple.Â There are 6 videos in total, one posted each day from July 28 – August 2. The first clip called Sad Full House; Stephanie’s Mistake has the caption:
In today’s Sad Full House, Danny Tanner aggressively berates his daughter Stephanie for a mistake she made.Â
That’s literally all there is. Take a look:
It’s practically genius. What changesÂ Full House completely? No love and happiness. Ben is sucking all the happiness out of sweet sitcoms. The beauty is in the sweet shortness and severity. The cast ofÂ Full House has done nearly everything they could to distance themselves from their goody-two-shoes characters, but before now nothing had tainted the actual show as much as these videos have.
I have to wonder what inspired Benjamin to do such a thing to such a beloved TV show? Was he an only child so he never got to experience the trials and tribulations of sibling rivalry? Was his hair never as dark and wavy as Uncle Jesse’s? Did he always long for his dad’s weird friend to live in his basement? These are serious questions, Ben.
There’s also the possibility that he got really high one night and was all like, “What if Full House was full of mean, sad people who yelled at each other and nothing got any better. It would just be like real life. Oh my God, I’m so sad. Pass me the lighter.”
However it came to be, it’s now in our lives forever. And in the spirit of mean Benjamin, I’ll leave you with another video while I go ponder my reason for being now that I’ve seen a bastardization of one of America’s most wholesome families.
P.S. Benjamin, if you’re reading this, I think we would be friends.