You know that thing where you’re at a Beyonce and Jay-Z concert and suddenly you’re missing part of your finger? No? Well, at least there’s now someone who’s had that experience who you can ask about it if you ever get the chance. Because that happened over the weekend. If Bey and Jay think this’ll distract us from the divorce rumors, they are wrong. But let’s talk about the finger incident for a minute anyway, because daaaamn.
Here’s how it happened. A 25-year-old man named Roberto Alcaraz-Ganica allegedly groped a woman in the audience of Beyonce and Jay-Z’s concert at the Pasadena Rose Bowl on Saturday. When the woman’s boyfriend confronted him about it, he allegedly bit off the boyfriend’s fingertip. Alcaraz-Ganica was arrested on suspicion of mayhem (aka maiming) and sexual battery. Now you’re free to insert whatever Gollum/Frodo/One Ring joke you’d like here. I’m not picky. Of course, it wasn’t the whole finger, which I guess is a good thing, but in general fingers should remain in tact on a person at all times, so this is still a pretty unsatisfactory situation.
Sounds a little like the “Hey, look over there! [runs away at the speed of light]” trick. No, I’m not accusing Beyonce and Jay-Z of setting up an elaborate finger-biting scenario in order to distract from all the divorce rumors that have been swirling around them. But hey, when the happy family photos or new songs won’t put the rumors to rest, you gotta take what you can get. And if what you can get is a guy having his finger bitten off, then so be it. But if they thought they were gonna get a headline out of me that didn’t have the word “divorce” in it, then they don’t know Jill. (That was kinda supposed to be a play on “you don’t know jack,” but I’m not sure if that came across, so this is just me telling you that you should be laughing right now. Are you? Okay, I’ll take your word for it.)
(Photo: Rob Rich / WENN.com)