When you see video of two people kissing, that’s usually a pretty convincing indicator that they’re together. But not so Zac Efron and Michelle Rodriguez! Watching them make out in this video is the surest I’ve ever been that this is a fakelationship.
In case you haven’t already been scratching your head over this couple for weeks now, let me catch you up. This time last month, we were blissfully unaware that Zac and Michelle were even friends until BANG. They were on vacation together in Italy, having impromptu dance-offs. And before we’d even wrapped our heads around that, there they were, kissing each other on a yacht. And then immediately after that, we’re hearing that they’ve been dating on-and-off since 2011 and I was like…no. Nope. Hold the phone. There’s no way any of this is happening, and I shan’t believe it for another moment.
I feel like these two are bearding for each other, plain and simple. They do seem to be friends, and I feel like they’d be hanging out regardless, and just decided one day to make out and mess with the paparazzi. They know they’re always under surveillance, so they just take fifteen seconds out of their days to touch tongues, and then go right back to vacationing.
Which is what they did in Ibiza this week, where they briefly stopped their dancing in a club to exchange saliva. Zachary kept his hands firmly at his sides, as we all do when we are kissing the mouth of someone whom we care about very much. Here’s the video.
Look at that! The romance latent in their stiff-armed snog! The passion contained in that brotherly hair toussle! I can practically hear the wedding bells from here.