Guys, I don’t know if you know this or not, but it’s James Franco’s world and we’re just living in it. While he goes around like a male Barbie, trying out every career and weird hobby he can think of, it’s our duty as inhabitants of James Franco’s Earth to make things easier for him. And right now you’re just making it so hard by taking sub-par selfies with him. So obviously he had to go on The Tonight Show and explain all the rules you should follow if you ever get the privilege of being in the same photo with him.
Apparently there are lots of things you can do wrong. Even though this photo is for your own record of celebrity encounters and not for James Franco’s record of fan encounters (although he probably has that, let’s face it), you really need to make sure that James looks as good as possible. And it’s because of your terrible selfie-taking skills that James is forced to wear a hat and sunglasses and keep himself from smiling in every fan photo he poses for. Maybe if you held just the damn phone correctly you would get a happy expression out of him.
So if you’re ever in the presence of James Franco and want a picture with him to remember what is no doubt the most important moment of your life, follow these simple rules. First, don’t spend too much time fiddling with the phone. There are a lot of other people who also want a picture with a miserable-looking Franco, and you’re taking too long. Second, don’t touch him. Third, don’t hold the camera too close or else he’ll look just plain awful in that picture he’ll never see. But also don’t hold it too high because then he’ll also look bad in that picture he’ll never see. Bottom line, make sure James Franco looks good in your fan selfie and there won’t be a problem.