Beyoncé Teased A Trailer For Fifty Shades of Grey For No Other Reason Than To Confuse You

Beyonce Laughing

Beyoncé teased a trailer for Fifty Shades of Grey on her Instagram account over the weekend for no reason, as far as I can tell, other than to confuse us all. Like, maybe there is a legitimate reason, such as the fact that she’s involved with the movie in some way. But from this angle, I can’t quite understand it. Because as you may or may not know, the entire production of Fifty Shades is —what someone might call— a flaming train wreck. And Beyoncé is the queen of the exact opposite genre of things. She wouldn’t even go to Kimye’s wedding for fear that it would be too much of a clown show. Which is why it surprises me so much that Hollywood’s reigning super-deity would be involved in any way with this movie, let alone promoting it on her social media accounts like it’s a point of pride or something.

Time suspects that Bey’s touting the sexytime movie’s trailer because it features a snippet of her and Jay Z’s song, “Crazy In Love.” A scary slowed-down snippet, which actually is more befitting of a creepy horror movie, but a snippet nonetheless. So that’s a good enough theory, until you remember that there have probably been dozens of movies that have used a song of theirs in trailers; but just this one has ended up on her Instagram. Hell, The Great Gatsby used music from Beyoncé and everyone she’s ever met, but still no mention of that when it was released. So, I’m guessing that her role could be much bigger than just a song or two tossed in. Which means that I totally would not judge you if you started to panic from sheer confusion right now.

The video, which was posted with the caption “#fiftyshades”, can be seen below. And then after you watch it, begin gathering your canned goods and flashlights and head to your bunkers. Because, if Beyonce is seriously involved with (or worse, in) this movie, we should expect the apocalypse shortly thereafter.

(GIF: Tumblr)

You can reach this post's author, Olivia Wilson, on twitter.
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    • Alexis Rhiannon

      This was so confusing to me! Whyyy would she get herself tangled up in that?

      • Olivia Wilson

        Maybe they offered her the role of the next person who drops out. You know it’s going to happen at least once more.

      • fantasymother

        Cause people are a’gonna see the movie even if they have to sneak in with bags over their heads, and then deny deny deny under oath.

        Beyonce knows this. “Dah movie sucked, but wasn’t that song cool?”

    • TJ

      But… what is happening on Thursday?

      • Olivia Wilson

        I believe that’s when the official trailer will be released. And if Beyonce is in it, you can just consider my brain exploded.

    • fantasymother

      Uh…Olivia, are you aware of what the bunker reference means relative to this book? Let me know if you don’t and I’ll give you a synopsis in time for you to edit the article.

      • Olivia Wilson

        Oooh, care to let me know?

    • Vera

      I wanna watch this movie with the force of 100 popcorn kernels (*.*)

      • Olivia Wilson

        Can we please measure enthusiasm exclusively in popcorn from now on?

    • Nbl

      What confuses me is why they are making a movie out of this crapsicle.

      • Olivia Wilson

        I don’t get it either. And with so many production issues, the movie itself doesn’t even seem to want to be made.

    • wutevs

      she’s obey probably doing the whole soundtrack! with new sexy versions of her songs DUUHHHH

      • wutevs

        obvy*

    • long tran

      Thanksss.

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    • http://leadrocket20.wordpress.com/ long tran

      This was so confusing to me
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