In “WTF were these people doing at the same wedding, let alone in the same room, let alone closer than ten miles apart?” news, Justin Bieber shared an Instagram video of Tom Hanks dancing at Scooter Braun’s wedding this weekend. If your response to that sentence is anything other than “Whaaaaaat?” then I think you should explain yourself immediately. Who are you and how are you able to pass this sort of information through your brain without it threatening to explode?
Scooter Braun is, for people who don’t keep up with Justin Bieber’s every sneeze and trip to the mop bucket, Bieber’s manager/babysitter. He married cancer activist Yael Cohen in Canada this weekend. I’m still not entirely sure why Tom Hanks was in attendance, but perhaps he knows the bride. Or maybe he pulled a real-life Big once and turned into a 13-year-old, only to have Scooter discover him at the supermarket and try to turn him into a star. That’s probably less likely, but you never know when Tom Hanks is involved. The man is made of magic.
As is this video, which Bieber captioned, “Haha Tom Hanks singing ‘This Is How we do it’ dressed like a Rabbi lol #thatdancetho.” For once I actually want to thank Justin Bieber for something, a feeling that’s causing me a bit of nausea, but I’ll get through it. Even though it’s Bieber who is responsible for me seeing this amazing video, I still can’t help but love it. Most things Tom Hanks does are pretty lovable. I want him to dance at my wedding. Will he be holding some kind of “Get Tom Hanks to Dance at Your Wedding and Make Your Life One Million Times Happier” contest, perchance? Because I am now engaged to the first person I can find who is willing to marry me, and I will be entering that contest as many times as I’m allowed.