Melissa McCarthy went on Chelsea Lately last night to promote her new movie Tammy, which unfortunately turned out to be just as bad and fat-joke-ridden as we feared it would be from the trailer. But at least Melissa got a fun jet ski story out of it. Any experience is a successful experience if you get at least one jet ski story out of it. Two is preferable, and three means you’re set for every cocktail party for the rest of your life. But one is acceptable as well.
What makes Melissa’s particular jet ski story even more of an instant classic is that it involves a wig. Wigs are automatic story improvers. If you can figure out how to work a wig into your next anecdote, everyone will remember you as “the person who told that great wig story,” and that’s exactly what you want. Wig story people go far in life. Because wigs are inherently funny. Just the word makes me chuckle. Missing wigs are even better, and that’s what Melissa’s story includes. A $9,000 missing wig, in fact.
Why a wig on a movie like this cost $9,000 I do not understand. Was it made from the mane of a unicorn? Or Kate Middleton’s hair? I guess Melissa and the crew should have considered the wig coming off and being lost at sea before she went out to test the water in full costume… and proceeded to flip the jet ski. Thankfully Melissa is okay and in one piece now. Which means it’s totally okay to laugh about the fact that her wig flew off her head in the process. Hehe, wigs. Missing wigs. Missing wet wigs. Wigs. Don’t ask me to explain my amusement. I just really enjoy stories about wigs. Maybe I need to get out more.