Jessa Duggar’s Hot Dates Are Now Being Chaperoned By Her Younger Siblings

Jessa Duggar Ben Seewald Hot Springs Twitter photo June 2014

While newlyweds Jill Duggar and Derick Dillard enjoyed their honeymoon — which was undoubtedly spent trumpet-kissing while outlining their five-year/ten-baby plan — her sister Jessa Duggar continued her whirlwind courtship with Ben Seewald. Ben shared a photo of them on their way to Hot Springs, Arkansa, this weekend. But lest you worry they went away together unsupervised, you can rest easy knowing Jessa’s younger siblings were there to play “lil chaperones,” as Starcasm puts it.

I guess Jessa’s father Jim Bob was busy getting his wife pregnant again or something, so he had to send in substitute chaperones to make sure Jessa and Ben didn’t go past the side hug stage of their relationship. Oh, you haven’t heard about the side hug? That’s as much as Jessa and Ben are allowed to do with each other. If you want to use baseball metaphors, if first base is kissing, I think side hugs are like the ticket booth. Or riding the subway on the way to the stadium. Or just thinking about going to a baseball game at some point in the future.

So little Justin and Johannah tagged along in the backseat, as evidenced by the above photo Ben posted to Twitter. Their presence was presumably to ensure no frontal bodily touching occurred. Because Jessa and Ben know better than to display such sinful behavior in front of impressionable children. Based on another photo Ben posted, however, those two courtbirds tried their darnedest to have a little side-to-side cheek-touching privacy without the kids around. But unfortunately, as evidenced by the tiny peace sign being given in the backseat (Where’d they learn that dirty hippie symbol?), the chaperones were still present.

Look at that heart Ben added. Does this mean he hearts Jessa? Moving a little quickly there, aren’t we, Ben? It might even be too soon for you to like like her. You save those emoji hearts for when you’re thirteen children into your relationship. Let’s not be risque while the kids are watching.

(Photo: Twitter)

You can reach this post's author, Jill O’Rourke, on twitter.
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    • M_G

      “…as evidenced by the tiny peace sign being given in the backseat (Where’d they learn that dirty hippie symbol?)” I AM AT WORK, JILL! I cannot risk “ROTFLMAO”-inducing moments. I’ll thank you to remember that in the future while ignoring the fact that I just admitted to traipsing around your website while at work…..

      • Jill O’Rourke

        Haha, I can’t make any promises.

    • Jenni

      I’m obsessed with the fact that they’re being babysat by their baby siblings.

      • Valerie

        I’ll bet if they give them a bag if Sour Patch kids Ben and Jessa could have like, 90 seconds for their faces to have sex. Kids are easily bought.

      • Caitlin Burrows

        I heard the going rate was Skittles.

      • texassa

        It’s a sad and gross lesson to teach young children that the opposite sex is dangerous and scary and must be watched at all times. Sex is not the most valuable aspect of human life. We are more than our vaginas. Say it with me!

      • Guest20

        They dont teach the opposite sex is dangerous and scary. Where did you get that?

      • texassa

        From their books, their interviews, watching their shows, and chaperoning/courting in general.

      • Guest20

        Ok, but they don’t teach they are dangerous and scary.

    • Kate

      How did you make it through this entire article without mentioning HER SHOULDERS. THEY EXIST EVEN WITHOUT SLEEVES

      • Myndee

        And she has her top unbuttoned exposing a tank top underneath! How scandalous!! If only Michelle would take half as much time as the girls do to get ready for their man, she would look so much better. It’s not like she has 17 kids at home to care for.

      • Kate

        Definitely don’t like when people shame Michelle for looking “frumpy”, especially after all the flack Kate Gosselin got for glamming up her image with a family less than half the size of the Duggar clan

      • Myndee

        She doesn’t even try to do anything special when she goes out for a special occasion! She is stuck in the 80s, and I’m not saying go do a complete overhaul and wear heels daily, but hell change her hairstyle and stop wearing denim potato sacks. She doesn’t take care of her kids, her kids do so she has time to fix her hair.

      • Guest20

        She looks good for 47.

    • J_Doe5686

      Those faces are too close to each other. I bet they gave the kids ice scream to distract them.

    • Lily Savage

      I don’t watch 19 Kids and Counting, but I love reading these articles! Is cheek touching legal in the Duggar house though??

      • Kate

        Their temples are side hugging!!!

      • texassa

        It is. They basically have shoulder/cheek sex, because hand-holding is too intimate.

    • MCR

      “..if first base is kissing, I think side hugs are like the ticket booth.”
      Side hugs are the seat right behind the foul pole. You can’t even see the action from there.

    • texassa

      I can see her shoulders! The Duggars are getting more and more lax on their dress rules. They used to look like Little House on the Prairie with their doilie dress collars and tight perm floof hairdos. Now their girls are sporting sultry eye makeup, modern clothing, bangs (!) and even bare shoulders. Looks like television can influence just about anyone eh?

      • Guest20

        They are older now and like the rest of us that hit that age, they are making their own decisions on dress and makeup.

    • Guest

      Um she’s kinda gorgeous.

    • Riggo

      Jill your article is so sarcastic and mean. What have they done to deserve such disrespect from you?

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