Sarah Jessica Parker is getting her first starring TV role since Sex and the City’s Carrie Bradshaw in Busted and I’m just worried that she’s not going to remember how to not be Carrie for long enough to play a believably hard-hitting reporter in a gritty crime show. You know, like how to help but wonder or to not break up and get back together with Big every damn day. What if she accidentally Blue skidoos out of one show into the other in the middle of an episode? These are the things that I worry about. Because basically, she will never ever not be Carrie to me and the rest of the world and I’m kind of sorry about it, but I’m also not.
The show, which comes from the producers of True Detective, is centered around the true story of two reporters’ undercover investigation of police corruption in Philadelphia. Technically, we’ve already seen that sort of plot done one million times before, but what’s Hollywood if not the best photocopier around? And don’t worry, the show isn’t also based on a book with a title that could be confused for a Lifetime movie. Just kidding! Busted, A Tale of Corruption and Betrayal in the City of Brotherly Love could totally find minor success as one of the network’s Original Movies. Maybe they’d even cast the rest of the SATC foursome and get two grudgingly-watched movies out of it.
I can see SJP now, wearing a wacky and confusing combination of tulle, oversized flowers and a tailored blazer (to look sensible, duh.) She’ll be pulling off bad guys’ masks everywhere and, each time, finding out that the criminal “could’ve gotten away with it, if it weren’t for those meddling children.” That’s two children’s cartoon references in under five minutes, if you’re keeping track.