Get excited, because there’s another quote to add to the list of things Kim Kardashian has said about her relationship with Kanye West that we can laugh at when they get divorced. Kim spoke to the Daily Mail at their Cannes party this week, and according to her the Kimye marriage is 100% sunshine and rainbows and butterflies made of money.
“I feel as though we’ll always be in the honeymoon period. We always say we really like to treat each other like it’s our birthday. I try to treat him like it’s his birthday every single day. I think we’ll always be like that. We always try to make life as fun and enjoyable as possible.”
Well Kim, if you really think that honeymoon of yours is going to last forever, you’ll want to make sure it’s not in Ireland, because that was miserable what with all that exhausting Photoshop work you had to do. So maybe pick a more pleasant destination. I hear there are some great places to live on the moon these days. And how fitting to have your infinite honeymoon on the actual moon. Better get going. Are you packing a bag? Why aren’t you gone yet?
Okay John Green, I guess you were just using a metaphor. But if Kim really does treat Kanye like every day is his birthday, does that mean he gets $20 Monopoly sets every day of his life? Those are going to start piling up pretty fast, and you really only need one set. Okay, maybe two. One classic one and one that’s themed to a TV show. You’re only human.
Kim also says she and Kanye talk to each other on the phone all the time. Seriously, right this minute they’re calling each other:
“We do travel, and work really hard, when we’re together – and even when we’re apart, we’re always on the phone 24/7 – just trying to make that time as memorable as possible.”
Okay, I know that was hyperbole (what a poet, that Kim Kardashian), but I’m still endlessly amused by the idea of Kim and Kanye just constantly talking on the phone, even when they’re in the middle of a bikini photo shoot or hitting a paparazzo: “Kanye, what was that noise?” “It was art. I made it with my fist.”