Justin Bieber’s DUI Charges Were Dropped, So There Goes That Whole Learning Your Lesson Thing

Justin Bieber pouting GIF


You know that thing where you break the law, get caught, and then receive a justifiable punishment to fit your crime?  Yeah, me too (long story, so let’s just say the struggle was real for a hot minute).  But that’s only because we’re not Justin “Human Shit Stain” Bieber, who apparently doesn’t have to answer for his DUI and resisting arrest charges back in January.  You’ll recall that he was not only driving under the influence (of alcohol, marijuana, and a heaping dose of over-inflated ego, I’m assuming), but he was excessively speeding as well, all on top of being a giant asshole to the arresting officers.  Remember that sweet, wittle baby-faced mugshot?  Yeah, I do too.  Fondly.

But any satisfaction 99% of the American population felt after seeing Justin Bieber in an orange jumpsuit is officially fleeting, because apparently all of those charges will be dropped.  According to an “exclusive” Us Weekly source, if Justin agrees to attend regular anger management courses, all charges will be dropped.  He won’t even have to serve any probation time.

“It’s a really good deal and he’s happy with it. He thinks it’s fair. He just wants to put the whole bad episode behind him and move on.”

Oh, no shit? He thinks it’s “fair”?  So weird! It’s also kind of weird that the justice system thinks this all can be resolved with a few “anger management” classes when it’s pretty clear this kid is in dire need of Learning Self Awareness And Humility 101.  I think I’d even settle for him agreeing to read a used copy of How Not To Be An Intolerable Shithead Asshole For Dummies from Amazon.

You can reach this post's author, Cassandra Hough, on twitter.
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    • Elizabeth Aspen

      Isn’t Miami technically still part of Florida, where they love to execute people? How come Justin isn’t sitting in ‘Ol Sparky right now? Oh right, money. Sorry, my bad. Welcome to America, Justin!

    • fantasymother

      Justin“Human Shit Stain” Bieber. I love it! However, I’d classify him a step below. Some are the givers, some are the receivers. I’d call him a giver, taking him out of the stain category. :-)

      • Emmet Willis

        What a foul mentality you are. No-one wonder you’re at home here.

      • fantasymother

        Your remark begs the question… why are you here?

        See my comment above. I was willing to call all of this media bias until his deposition.

      • Emmet Willis

        Four and half hours of being grilled by an ambulance chaser/lawyer who has done nothing but talk to gossip outlets before and since the depo, and lets forget JB is being sued being sued by a member of the industry that stalks ppl for a living.

        Yeah, sounds like something anyone would like to go through.

        On videotape.

        On the day (March 6) video of footage of his urine test went public.

        TMZ’s leaks were rather timely as well. Notice they never did post his apology to the court reporter.

        I track the media on JB. It is palpably biased, malevolent and gleeful and is a complete misuse of freedom of the press.

      • Johnstone

        Why ARE you here? All you do is comment on/defend JB stories. I reckon you’re a prime example of someone who needs to “GET ON WITH THEIR OWN LIFE”.

      • Isabelle

        Defending a person is a lot more constructive than constantly making fun of him.

    • Isabelle

      He’s taking anger management classes, if the rumors are true than it looks like it is something that will help him, arguably more so than jail time.

    • Emmet Willis


      Wishing death on someone you don’t know, calling them fecal waste, and the author of this article ignoring the fact that first time offences for DUI routinely resolve in plea deals in most US states to peddle the premise that “Bieber got away with it.”

      Inflammatory BS is alive and kicking at Crushable.

      Well done everyone.

      • Alyssa

        Wishing death on someone, what? There were multiple arrests surrounding this DUI arrest. He has not been held accountable for any one thing he’s done because he’s famous.

      • Emmet Willis

        There were two arrests. Period.

        If you look in the comments below, you’ll see one of the posters is hoping for Bieber’s death. That’s unacceptable and obviously negates her claim to any kind of moral superiority. .

        Re:Plea deal:

        CNN report http://edition.cnn.com/2014/02/25/showbiz/justin-bieber-legal-troubles/ — first time non-fatal DUI’s routinely resolve in plea deals.

        Bieber’s settlement terms are standard, and in fact as you can see from what was being initially asked e.g PSA and what happened with the urine test video being released, he got a tougher ride because of his fame.

        That’s plenty accountable..

      • Alyssa

        Ahh, nope. That’s not being held accountable for anything. He gets to “attend anger management classes” which he wont, but someone will sign off that he did. He’s been in trouble constantly for the last year or so. Vandalism, egging a house, his friend being arrested for possession in BIEBER’S HOME, the DUI, drag racing, being an asshole to the police officers, harassing a flight attendant. None of which he has had to answer for. He paid all his troubles away. It’s pathetic. He needs to have his visa revoked, sit down, and grow up.

      • fantasymother

        You forgot the deposition. That didn’t require media bias, that was a display that can’t be misinterpreted.

      • Alyssa

        That deposition was stomach turning. I couldn’t even watch the whole thing.

      • Emmet Willis

        We’ll just have to disagree Alyssa.

        If people spent half their time they do ragging on Bieber as they would on their faults and shortcomings, this world would be a different place.

        Bieber has his work to do sure. Is he alone in that?

        And, obviously he will attend the anger management classes.

        Who made you oracle? Get on with your own life.

      • FemelleChevalier


        This particular argument is so full of fallacy. You’re making an assumption that people who comments on the internet have no life. Guess what? YOU ARE COMMENTING ON THE INTERNET. WHY AREN’T YOU GETTING ON WITH YOUR LIFE?

        Why should Alyssa educate herself on Justin Bieber’s plights? Isn’t that the opposite of “getting on with her life”? So instead of getting on with her job and life after typing comments for a few minutes, she should waste a few hours in “educating” herself for Justin Bieber like you did?

        Aren’t you full of irony. Stay in school.

      • fantasymother

        *Also, sweetheart, he’s not here on a visa.*

        How then, does this Canadian live in the States? Green Card I suppose – and there are specific requirements in order to maintain resident status that aren’t a great deal different from those required for visa entry.

        As for the deposition… who the attorneys were has no bearing in a deposition. His own attorneys were front and center throughout the deposition, making sure irrelevant questions weren’t part of the proceedings. Bieber’s demeanor was that of a spoiled brat who felt entitled to behave in whatever manner he chose, regardless of the seriousness of the setting, and in doing so gave the world a window into the adult-child behind the millions – and it was a pretty offensive view.

      • FemelleChevalier

        I think you meant one commenter: particularly one who has a habit of being snarky in most of her comments. Bieber is not special; Elizabeth Aspen do this to almost every celebrity on Crushable.

        Generalizing those who are not impressed with Bieber’s antics by lumping them into one category is rather narrow-minded, isn’t it? I can say that it’s as bad as you thinking that Bieber is being harassed by the media even though they “don’t know him” at all.

        I can also say that we are all narrow-minded, including you. The difference is that you don’t really know us to generate an accurate opinion based on a couple of sentences we typed on the internet. Saying that, Justin’s actions are very well documented. I believe our negative biases towards him has more warrant than you on us.

      • Isabelle

        I don’t see the generalizing or grouping everyone together negatively in her post.

      • FemelleChevalier

        “Commenters wishing death on someone you don’t know…”

        That one is faulty, seeing that only one commenter has said so.

        “What a foul mentality you are. No-one wonder you’re at home here.

        This is an assumption that people who regularly comments on this site has a foul mentality. The commenter is making an assumption based on another commenter—a stranger, in fact—who she knew nothing about.

        “Well done everyone.”

        Who is this everyone she speaks of? Elizabeth again? Is everyone comprises of one person? Is everyone comprises of Elizabeth plus the author?

        This kind of personal attacks isn’t conducive to a decent conversation. She has her opinions on Bieber, you have yours, and I have mine. We all have opinions, just that most aren’t impressed with his actions lately. Hence, this blog piece. But does she—the commenter—have a right to make assumptions and generalizations? Well, she does: this is the internet after all. But if she has that right, then I also have that right to call her out on it.

      • Isabelle

        I just don’t think it’s beneficial to read into everything.

      • FemelleChevalier

        Maybe, but I’ll be childish and say that she started it.

        Personal attacks irritate me. It’s irrational, illogical, and presumptuous with no grounds to back it up.

    • Jaime

      Cassandra wow. Human shit stain ? Intolerable shithead asshole? You have no clue about the details of the case and you do not know justin and probably have never net him. On judgement day if we are judged according to how we judge others I would be very concerned if I were you. You of all people should know how the media likes to build ppl up to tear them down and twist everything to slant things the way they want. I agree he needs to take responsibly for his wrong actions when he’s in the wrong and as he matures and grows he is learning that. Sometimes ppl have to learn the hard way but it’s not necessarily the wrong way. How cowardly of you to bully someone you don’t know from behind your computer screen in the name of journalism. Sad really. Anger management would help him get to the root of his pain and arrogance so I’m not sure why you’re hating on that idea. Where is the encouragement? Do you feel that badly about yourself that you have to tear others down to make yourself feel better? Hate is ugly and mean people suck. Journalism. Pffft. What is this world coming to?

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