Whether you love ‘em or not, we can all agree that toddlers and kids are hilariously adorable singers. With all the lack of inhibition and surplus of confidence that only a four-year-old can possess, toddlers singing like no one is listening is my second most used YouTube search (puppies and babies interacting is my first) Though it’s awesome and comforting to see them see feminist, age-appropriate songs, it’s equally (if not more so) wonderful when they sing inappropriate songs they shouldn’t know.
As a 20-year-old who only just realized the sexual connotation of J Gelis Band’s “Centerfold” (a song I used to blast on my flowered boom box by the way), spent a majority of her middle school life listening (and awkwardly dancing) to songs like ‘Promiscuous’ by Nellie Fertada, and had specifically choreographed moves to ‘The Bad Touch’, I find it particularly hilarious when little kids belt out songs with no clue towards what the lyrics actually mean. Apparently, their parents (and Ellen) enjoy it just as much as I do and awesomely posted these videos online.
So, maybe you’ll love these, or maybe they’ll make you nostalgic for the Frozen phenomenon, either way, you’ll have a smile on your face.
1. “Low” by Flo Rida
This boy’s diction is so off the charts, I can totally envision the baggy sweatpants and the Reeboks with the straps! A+ my friend!
2. “Drunk In Love” by Beyoncé
Who cares if he doesn’t know what ‘surfbort’ or what a ‘sexually aggressive music video about a monogamous relationship’ means, Beyoncé was meant to be belted out by everyone. You know it, I know it, the baby knows it.
3. “Sexy And I Know It” by LMFAO
This makes me cry tears of joy. His use of floor work would make Fat Amy jealous.
4. “Timber” by Pitbull and Ke$ha
I love when she presses her face against her sister’s while serenading her. Also, when they bust out their lasso moves they look like synchronized Annie Oakleys.
5. Heavy Metal Song
The intensity! The headbanging! The demonic voice! What’s not to love?
6. “Someone Like You” by Adele
I’m modeling my next Adele car singalong after this girl’s passion.
7. “When I Was Your Man” Bruno Mars
This rendition redefined cuteness and marked the day Kai and Ellen went steady.
8. “Love You Like A Love Song” by Selena Gomez
I like to sing Selena Gomez while only wearing underwear too, but (strangely) people think it’s weird and not cute. Ride the wave while it lasts, adorable child.
9. “Girl On Fire” by Alicia Keys
Dancing is all in the knees and the gestures (helloooo spirit fingers) and this toddler proves it.
10. “Hit Me Baby One More Time” by Britney Spears
Alright so he’s not a toddler, but his dance moves deserve recognition. Also when his mom scares him, I completely lost it. (Yes, I’m a monster, but so are you because you will laugh)
11. “I Knew You Were Trouble” by Taylor Swift
Ugh, it’s the worst when you’re attracted to a notorious bad boy! AmIRight, toddler?
12. “Wrecking Ball” by Miley Cyrus
Nailed the chorus and she has the sassy head bob down like a pro. Bring in the levitating hot dog!