Lifetime Movie The Secret Sex Life Of A Single Mom Should Have Stayed A Secret

Lifetime movie Secret Sex Life of a Single Mom

Most people would read a message from someone who calls himself The Duke and immediately delete it. Most people you meet online who call themselves The Duke are also probably not handsome businessmen with huge lakehouses. If this had turned into a catfishing movie, I would have been a lot more entertained. But of course Delaine starts a phone relationship with this guy, who orders her to do things like take her clothes off in front of a window and date a younger guy, all under the pretense of liberating her. That’s right, Delaine becomes empowered by having a guy order her over the phone to get on her knees and beg for forgiveness while calling him “Sir.” Did you not know this movie would be about feminism? You silly bean.

The younger guy Delaine ends up dating is Payton (Wesley Morgan), a 24-year-old who shows up to their first date looking like he just left a frat party. Delaine’s just supposed to use him as her sex toy, but I don’t think she ever makes that clear to Payton, who buys her earrings on their three-month anniversary and wants to meet her kids. Oops, 24-year-old men have feelings and stuff? Awkward. Before I move on from the Payton storyline, I should mention that The Duke has Delaine take him to a sex club, which is less Eyes Wide Shut and more just a sleazy-looking warehouse where nobody makes it past second base. VIEWER DISCRETION ADVISED.

Once Delaine gets rid of that pesky Payton and his emotions, she starts wanting to hook up with The Duke. And also to ask him for business advice, because like every Lifetime movie heroine ever, she wants to start an online interior design business. While her kids are with her husband’s family for Thanksgiving, Delaine makes a trip to Seattle to talk business and be sexually submissive. Just to make that clear, this woman spends Thanksgiving away from her children and spends money on a trip to Seattle so some creeper she met online can tell her, “You will not wear panties in my presence.” Oh, and he also makes her wait around to have sex for an hour while he works silently on his laptop. SEXAY. (The actual sex is like five seconds of them kissing naked under strategically placed sheets. Lord, I got more than that from Petals on the Wind, and even though it was between siblings, that still only got a TV-14.)

But it’s so liberating, and it changes her as a person, you guys! Before she leaves to go home, Delaine and The Duke have an emotional goodbye as they look out over the water behind his house. The hug tenderly, and I think Lifetime wants me to be crying or something? Crying about a woman who is returning to her children after spending the holidays with a man who threatens to walk her around town on a leash to punish her for disobeying him. At this point I was too busy wishing TV movies included some kind of “off” button for excessive voiceover narration. This movie really should have been called Please Shut Up, Delaine.

When Delaine returns home as a changed woman, she starts that online company, and because she’s in a TV movie it becomes successful within weeks. She also gets inspired to have a better relationship with her ex-husband and meets a new man at the party store while shopping for her daughter’s birthday. We’re not told whether or not she’s allowed to wear underwear in his presence. Fingers crossed there’s a sequel so we can get an answer.

(Images: Lifetime)

You can reach this post's author, Jill O’Rourke, on twitter.
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    • Elizabeth

      This review was so MUCH better than the movie! I had to watch it to the very end – similar to a train wreck. I cannot believe any actor would agree to this farce. It was so stupid, it was actually funny.

      • Jill O’Rourke

        Thanks for reading. Lifetime is the premier source for train wrecks.

    • JustSaying

      This movie was based on another book, not 50 Shdes! It’s a memoir by the same name and it’s wonderful. Lifetime recked it. But the book is more than worth a read. True too. It’s by Delaine Moore.

      • Jill O’Rourke

        Oh I know it’s based on a different book, I was just saying that Lifetime seemed to be advertising it to play into the Fifty Shades obsession.

    • Sigh

      i loved this review SO much! thanks for the laugh. I was really disappointed in this movie – it was completely pointless and didn’t make any sense. I thought it was funny and kept cracking up just because it was so dumb. the title for this article is too fitting.

      • Jill O’Rourke

        Thanks for reading!

    • Cbalducc

      Looks like Ashley Jones, who played the lead trainwreck, is a Lifetime repeat offender, having played Mrs. Wronged Woman in last year’s “A Sister’s Revenge”.
      If Lifetime wanted to serve us some more cheese, why did they have to make it limburger? Another “Trashcanadian” production, no doat aboat it!

    • her7

      #1: I look forward all week to your reviews of Lifetime movies. I don’t even watch them, I just really enjoy what you have to say about them.
      #2: I would absolutely watch a movie called Please Shut Up, Delaine.

      • Jill O’Rourke

        Thanks for reading! I’m glad you enjoy. And that really would have been a better title for this one.

      • Luvee

        True dat girl. True dat. I ask god that why the hell her secret was ever revealed for us to suffer through that…. He he he…

    • mm girl

      I am at the other side of the coin . The actor playing the Dominant was very convincing in the way he changed his tone. Gave me chills but I have experienced this lifestyle . And if you understand anything about submission you would know its liberating for both parties. I wish this movie was more intense with the situations between the Dom and sub. It was nice to see bdsm in a positive light .

      • mdd43

        To me, this movie was more of a caricature of d/s. How safe or sane is it to let some man you “met” online order you to do things like take your clothes off in front of an open window when your neighbors are nearby? (Perhaps he really wanted to bring the cops to her door?)

    • Totallyoff

      I’m on the other side of the coin too. If u’ve experienced D/s and understand what it is, this movie will speak to u. Lifetime was brave to put a toe in these waters. If you’re vanilla it’ll go over your head. I like how it handled divorce issues too cause this film isn’t just about sex. When she told her husband that her sex life had nothing to do with ability to parent, I was like good on you. Your opinion will depend on the filter of your own experiences or lack thereof.

    • Penelope

      When do these Lifetime Movies even air? I never see them On Demand!

      • Jill O’Rourke

        Sorry for the late reply, just saw this. The new ones are on Saturday nights.

    • TWL

      Seriously, the WORST. MOVIE. EVER. At the end I had the most confused look on my face like, what the hell did I just watch? There was absolutely no point to this movie. None at all. I couldn’t wait to hear your review because I knew you’d feel the same way!

      • speakingfromexperience

        Just curious but how did this movie have no point? There are some good points that come out of a divorce. As far as I know she had become happier after the divorce to a disrespectful man and it points out how co-parenting in separate homes is healthier than parenting in a unhappy marriage.

      • Just Sayin

        I agree. Divorce can be a hard, life changing experience. Especially when you get to keep the house and not have to worry about having a job. Don’t get me wrong, her ex husband was a real dick. But in the grand scheme of things, her life wasn’t as bad as say a single mother having to raise two children by working like two jobs or some shit like that. This movie was some bullshit.

    • The Duke!

      I love your reviews… I have five words for you: TONY GOLDWYN IS WARREN JEFFS. President Fitz has 50 wives. MUST. WATCH. CANNOT. RESIST.

      • Jill O’Rourke

        Thanks for reading! And oh yes, that will be interesting.

      • Jenni

        This is happening??

      • Jill O’Rourke

        YES. June 28.

    • Wtf?

      She has no job and got to keep that nice ass house in the divorce……man life is so hard

    • Truth Hurts

      I don’t know what’s more disgusting…
      The fact that a ‘mother’ is more worried about her tw*t than her kids, or the
      fact that there are women out there that like this garbage let alone write a two page review on it…