If Suki Waterhouse and Bradley Cooper are seriously engaged, then this is officially the furthest I’ve ever seen a fakelationship taken in my whole life. I gotta give you guys props for stamina but, c’mon. Are we really doing this?
I mean, sure, there are celebrity couples who make less sense than the two of them, but they’d been together for years by the time I started paying attention. These two I’ve watched pretending to date each other since day one, and every day I’ve waited with bated breath for the moment when they break up and I can spring out of the bushes and scream, “I KNEW IT ALL ALONGGGGGG!”
But for as (im)patiently as I’ve been waiting, maybe it’s time for me to accept that that moment will never come, as Suki was seen strolling around with what Entertainmentwise points out is OH YOU KNOW JUST A BIG OLD ROCK on the ring finger of her left hand. And since we live in a society where diamonds on that finger still foretell a coming wedding, it’s a pretty safe assumption that Bruki Watercoose isn’t gonna be calling it quits any time soon. Even though they were rumored to have broken up a while ago, to the point that we started picking out new beards for Bradley to try out! Sorry Nina Dobrev — better luck next time.
(This also means I should probably spend some time thinking of a better name for them as a couple than Bruki Watercoose, because there’s absolutely no way I can say that with a straight face.)
(Photo: Andres Otero / WENN.com)
I couldn’t find a photo that was high-resolution enough to be able to zoom in super close on the rock, but I can confirm from a cursory glance that the ring is indeed on her left hand and that it does indeed sparkle with the fire of a thousand suns. Which it would sort of have to, if it wanted to erase the memory of that fateful park photo shoot where Bradley and Suki were just learning to touch each other for the first time.
So who knows if these two really are engaged, but either way, I’m gonna snuggle into this foliage here a little more cozily and keep telling myself that all my conspiracy theories will one day come true.