You may not know this, but something about me is that I really really love internet commenters. Not in a ‘let’s get married’ kind of way, but in a ‘oh my god I can’t believe you’re yelling that at me in all caps, I’m obsessed’ kind of way.
And of all the internet commenters out there, fans of the Duggars, the family behind 19 Kids And Counting, are probably the best. They’re conservative, they’re vocal, and they’re really upset with me for suggesting that nineteen children, one miscarriage, a premie, and two emergency c-sections might be enough for one uterus – Michelle‘s. (I know, I really have some nerve.)
So from a post that currently has over 375 comments, I chose just a few of my favorite rage-filled responses, and sprinkled them in here with some extremely intelligent thoughts from our more regular readers who were brave enough to wander into the fray.
Read with care, it can get a little shouty.
1. conservgirl gets derailed by her own opinion:
Its none of our business how many kids they have. They have supported them all. It would be different if they were like the octomom or that woman who had 12 kids and expected us to pay for them. I think she should quit having children since the older you are the more the child may have downs syndrome.
2. JenH1986 makes an excellent point about adoption:
I always think maybe God wants them to see fit to give themselves one by adopting or fostering. The kids seem to be doing ok (minus the raising the siblings and no hand holding until engagement) and they aren’t on assistance from the state. Maybe they could give back the way God wants by offering a safe home for another child, even if it’s only temporary. I understand the desire for bio children, but I know we have always discussed adoption and fostering in addition to or in place of bio kids.
3. MystikSpiral reminds us why it’s okay to comment on these people and their beliefs:
They do their show to preach and to show other people what their life is like. By doing so, they freely give others the right to make judgements based on what they see.
I don’t see a loving, intelligent family. I see two parents who are more interested in having as many kids as humanly possible than raising and getting to know the ones they already spawned. I see older siblings used as parents because there are too many children for two people to conceivably raise. I see a whole pile of kids who are home-schooled by either (a) a parent with no understanding or knowledge of basic science and a poor grasp on simple grammar, or (b) an older sibling who was home-schooled by (a).
4. Guest practices for his or her SATs tomorrow:
Sounds like one hateful group is right here on this comment board: A group obsessed with degrading a family because their views and practices are dissimilar from their own. That fact alone makes the bitter diatribe demonstrated on this board and instigated by such a sophomoric article, ironically hypocritical.
5. dy burns an image onto the insides of my eyelids:
I want her uterus to jump out of her and just throw up its fallopian tubes and say “no way girl…no way.”
6. rdeesw is confused by the concept of a gossip site:
Whoa! How unkind your comments are. You can disagree with her life choices. (I do.) You may question her motives and her theology. (I do.) BUT — you can disagree and question without lacing your comments with snark. What you have written says a whole lot about you.
7. Kelly pours one out for the women out there who are struggling with fertility:
She’s publicly stated many times that women should be available to their husbands for sex any time he wants it, whether the woman wants it or not. She believes a woman’s only purpose in life is to create children. Yes, that is shaming infertile women by saying they have no purpose in life.
I’ve never heard of an athletic man in the NBA walking around saying all men should be in the NBA and that those who choose not to be in the NBA are morally inferior.
As for what you assume I can’t do… I could stop giving a shit about my health and become a baby machine. I physically have the ability to do that just like Michelle Duggar. She isn’t doing anything I can’t do so obviously I’m not jealous of her. She’s broken because she has nothing else in life but baby making. That’s not healthy for anyone. I don’t expect her to stop until she destroys herself. Boy, that’ll sure be entertaining for her “fans”, won’t it? Just out of curiosity, will you cry or clap when she starts delivering dead babies and eventually dies herself?
8. Karissa Sights thinks the older siblings are just like teachers…who didn’t choose their vocation and make absolutely no money from it. Yup, exactly the same:
A lot of you guys are talking about how “sickening” or “wrong” it is that the older girls “raise” the little ones, but in a similar way aren’t you doing the same thing when you send your kids to school? The teacher has your children for about 8 hours for 5 days out of the week. The adds up to 40 hours a week. They tell your kids what they can and can not do, they teach them things that they believe, and your kids listen to them. If you have ever spent any amount of time with more than 6-7 kids simultaneously, you need a buddy system. Otherwise kids will do what they want and you probably wouldn’t have a house standing. That’s just how little kids are. They need supervision. Since nearly everybody seems to be so against the buddy system I would like for you all to try it with a good amount of kids and see how it goes. Let me save you some time, it’s not going to work. It just doesn’t. All kids need somebody to remind them sometimes of the things that they shouldn’t do. If you have a descent amount of kids the buddy system is necessary. And guess what, they use the buddy system at school, so if it’s such a bad thing then why do they use it too
9. Alyssa is understandably worried about Michelle’s health:
I’m more worried that she can no longer carry a baby to full term. that last baby barely made it. Why keep allowing that to happen? Complications can arise in any pregnancy, whether it be the first or last, but if your uterus has previously held 19 children, and the last was born so premature she nearly died, perhaps you need to reevaluate. And ugh, the fact that they have “team leaders” and pass the little ones off to older kids drives me insane, no one gets to enjoy their childhood. They are forced to become parents to their siblings before they are ready. No kid deserves that kind of responsibility. The Duggers have kids for the sake of having kids.
10. TRUTH2014 has some really intelligent ideas about brainwashing. (His own.):
The bottom line is they can do whatever they choose too do. Call it whatever you want too. Gays and lesbian couples “brainwash” their kids into believing that their lifestyle is somehow ‘normal” and they were born that way and it’s okay to step outside of the institution of marriage the way God intended for it to be between a man and a woman. The more important point to allude to from this article is the author was very foolish to blaspheme GOD in the way she did. She offended many folks and then to go attack Michelle this way, so distasteful!!! I am not judging, I am spreading TRUTH according the Holy Word of GOD Almighty!
11. M_G brilliantly explains the difference between tolerance and criticism:
Being “tolerant” of something and being “critical” of something is different. People tolerate the Duggars insofar as they’re not making open threats against them, demanding they be taken off the air, etc. But tolerance of something doesn’t exempt that something from criticism. In the case of the personal experiences you talked about, it’s a different story because you weren’t putting forth your personal choices for the global audience to see (to my knowledge…..unless you’re an Osmond….). So you are within your right to expect a level of privacy that the Duggers cannot, and it is that fact which leaves them open to criticism on a much larger scale.
12. Bryant Bajema reminds me of my many luxuries as a ‘columnist’. Namely, to persecute:
Sometimes those who often preach tolerance at all costs sound the least
bit tolerant of those with whom they seem to disagree. The Duggars are
raising a productive, happy, intelligent family- individuals this world
lacks. Some save trees, others rescue puppies, some choose to raise
above average children and send them out into the world. They are
excellent examples of living in a way that is not popular, yet they do
not come across as judgmental in the slightest- even when given numerous
opportunities. They always say “WE believe” without imposing their
perspectives on others, as is the luxury of a columnist such as yourself.
If you look around and no one is persecuting you, consider that you may
be the persecutor.
13. MS would like us to let the Duggars be (but wouldn’t that kind of ruin the ratings for their show??):
Why do we judge what other people are doing ? We should look at ourselves. We are all not perfect. They live their lives with their believes. Are we judging their religion? They are only screwing the government with all their tax deductions. Wouldn’t we love to do that too? JUST LET THEM BE !!
14. Kelly nails the response:
If everyone let them be, how would they support their family? They’d lose their show and a massive amount of income.
I don’t think they’d appreciate you trying to destroy their livelihood.
15. Lynn Elliott would prefer I not put my own spin on this…blog post I wrote:
What a mean hateful and twisted version of the Duggar’s lives. If you are going to review someone else don’t put your own spin on their lives or interpret their words for them. You have no idea about their relationship with God. I have regularly watched their show and although I don’t agree with everything they believe or do, they made their own choice to live the way they choose. If it makes them happy then leave it alone. I don’t know anyone else who interprets their motives in this way.The person who wrote this just seems mean spirited and bitter. Their family seems so much more well adjusted and happy then most of the families you see now. There is obviously a lot of love in that family and that is something that the author completely overlooked.
16. And luckily Sarah is here to (very bizarrely) bring it all back around to racism:
Since we the American Family have no right to have children; but the Africans and south Americans can have kids they do not even want or can take care of. These are kids having kids who are having kids. Then everybody “wonders” why all these kids commit all these horrific crimes! Spay and neuter all these people. Why should the Americans pay for kids having kids!! VERY WRONG.