Khloe Kardashian guest-hosted Chelsea Lately for the 600th time and defended herself against most probably non-existent rumors that she’s banging her brother, Rob Kardashian. Seriously, I’ve never heard whispers around the rumor mill where I work on weekends and I certainly didn’t arrive at that conclusion on my own. Because siblings outside of the Lifetime Original Movie universe live together all of the time without sneaking off to the bedroom when no one’s looking.
But, ya know, Khloe just wants to be sure that you know that for real for real.
“Most people know me as the sister of fashion icon and sock tycoon Rob Kardashian. Rob’s been on my mind a lot lately because we’re currently living together. No, we’re not sexually involved. My brother’s nearly not black enough for me!”
Tell the truth, did you not suspiciously look around the room after reading that? (Even, and maybe especially, if you’re alone.) Because I actually can’t stop doing that. Is the real reason that she isn’t sleeping with Rob that he isn’t black, that she doesn’t want to get uninvited from Kimye’s wedding by association, or something else entirely? What are you trying to say with this odd as hell joke, Khloe?? I just don’t know.
Remember when Kanye West rapped about how hot he finds all of Kim Kardashian’s sisters and you thought that family’s sexual affairs couldn’t get any stranger? Well here Khloe is, excelling with flying colors in weirding people out. Although, now I think I should be congratulating her because it’s a true feat to surpass Kanye when it comes to baffling the general population. But can we just agree to quit making me think about Kardashian incest? Thaaanks.