In news that makes me excited enough to enter a geftile fish eating contest,Â Andrew Garfield justÂ came out in an interview and said that Spider-Man is Jewish. As in The AmazingÂ Spider-Man.Â I mean, maybe this is the 18 pounds of matzoh I’ve eaten in the last 24 hours talking here, but I am absolutely overjoyed to hear this news. Mostly because Jews aren’t known for their athletic prowess. We can do books very well. And we can do “complaining about men adding a few inches to their height on their JDate profiles” VERY well. But sports, eh, not so much. Getting Spider-Man on our team changes all that. Dude can do crazy tricks, including, but not limited to, shooting spider webs out of his body and scaling skyscrapers. Tell you what, with moves like that, I can forgive him for dating a gentile. (LOLOLOLOL, I couldÂ neverÂ be mad at anyone for datingÂ Emma Stone)
Andrew says in an interview that’s onÂ The GuardianÂ that it’s almost too obvious that the superhero is Jewish.
â€śSpider-man is neurotic. Peter Parker is not a simple dude. He canâ€™t just switch off,â€ť Garfield toldÂ Time Out. â€śHe never feels like heâ€™s doing enough. And Peter suffers from self-doubt. He ums and ahs about his future because heâ€™s neurotic. Heâ€™s Jewish. Itâ€™s a defining feature.â€ť
And don’t worry guys, Andrew can say all this because he’s Jewish. Also because this whole Jewish thing has apparently been a rumor forever now.
Some Spidey scholars believe the story is an allegory for post-War Judaism in America. An orphan, as many Jewish children were as a result of Nazi atrocities, Parker is a â€śgood, smart boyâ€ť who lives with his aunt and uncle in Forest Hills, Queens, home to one of the largest Jewish communities in New York.
While I’d never heard this before, I’ve also never taken a real interest in superheroes. They always just seemed a little show-offy. Like cool, you can fly. But can you order eggs at brunch and then not regret it when someone’s french toast arrives looking amazing. I mean that’s a power that I envy.
However, now that I know Spidey is part of the tribe, that changes everything. I’m suddenly very into knowing everything about him. Also at staring at his adorable little tuchas in those adorable little tights.