• Thu, Apr 10 - 11:51 am ET

Details From Prince George’s Playdate Reveal He’s Quite The Little Dictator Already

Prince George New Zealand playdate baby crying

While we all spent yesterday oooing and awwing over the video of Prince George’s New Zealand playdate, we’re now getting word from insiders that everything wasn’t going as well as we all thought. In a People expose titled “What Prince George Revealed About Himself at his Playdate,” sources step forward to give us the scoop on this baby Kim George Un. And guys, I gotta warn you that what you’re about to read will shock you, possibly even floor you. If your mouth isn’t already on the ground, you might want to place it there preemptively.

First of all, this kid flaunted his royal status from the second Kate Middleton (known henceforth as Duchess Pattie Malette) placed him on the floor among the baby serfs.

Prince George showed he was king of the room as he boldly grabbed toys and crawled confidently across the floor

Yes, this little monster had the audacity to crawl CONFIDENTLY across a room that’s approximately 234820398 miles out of his royal jurisdiction. Then get this, he started behaving as if he owned the place. Literally, according to Grant Collange, a man who is not at all attributing adult characteristics to a tiny human still incapable of controlling his own bowel movements.

He knows how to be the boss “and is bubbly, quite feisty and he took control,” Collinge says. “He owned the place. No one was going to stand in his way!”

Then, believe it or not, Prince Joffrey’s George’s behavior got worse…

He’s not averse to ensuring he gets his way with some force. When baby Alve Eden, dressed in floral dress and headband, got in George’s way, he reached out to stroke her face – but was a bit too far and hit Eden in the face with a flailing arm.

and worse…

George waved his arms to get her attention and touched Paige’s face – before grabbing her toy wooden doll, which sent Paige into her mother’s arms.

and holy crumpets on a plate of fish and chips, even worse…

George was not done. He grabbed at several other toys from other youngsters before Kate encouraged him to crawl to her

To recap this historic day of destroyed babies for you, Prince George rampaged his way through this “adorable” playdate and made it clear through increasingly aggressive behavior that he was in charge of this whole event. And that as far as the other babies were concerned, they were lucky to even be in the presence of his diapered majesty. May his behavior there send a message to Baby Alve Eden, all the other Baby Alve Edens out there — that no one touches a toy before Prince George sticks it his mouth and drools on it first.

Also Baby Paige, try growing some balls.

(Photo: Getty Images)

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  • Jill O’Rourke

    That photo could not be more perfect.

    • Jenni

      I love it because you can see Baby Alve Eden still looking happy and content with her life.

  • DanielKFox

    And that as far as the other babies were concerned, they were lucky to even be in the presence of his diapered majesty. May his behavior there send a message to Baby Alve Eden, all the other Baby Alve Edens out there — that no one touches a toy before Prince George sticks it his mouth and drools on it first. http://qr.net/tr4Y

    • Jenni

      I couldn’t have said it better myself!

    • J_Doe5686

      Alive Eden would be able to tell the story to her grandkids about how she was slapped by a prince. Now, how many people can say that?

    • Lackadaisical

      Depends on what kind of prince he becomes in later life. The answer may well be “the arse of every chambermaid in all of his palaces”.

    • Lackadaisical

      I notice that neither Alve nor Paige curtseyed to him properly. Such plebs, no wonder he felt the need to put them in their places.

  • elle

    England better watch out in about 50 years when Prince George is in charge. I suspect pandemonium and chaos with this little dictator. This expose shows me he is clearly akin to Chairman Mao or Pol Pot. Oh People why so ridiculous all the time?

    • Jenni

      I’m hoping this writer’s attempting to make a joke. Am I hoping for too much?

    • elle

      If you are referring to me, yes I was just making a joke. He’s not acting any different than any other baby. If you are referring to the People writer I honestly couldn’t tell if they were joking or not. It’s so hard to tell with People….they are very earnest.

    • J_Doe5686

      Well, this is a sarcastic article.

    • Jenni

      Never to you! I was addressing the People writer/expose-ist.

    • elle

      Ok that’s what I thought. Idk…..the writers at People just take celeb gossip so seriously that I just assumed they meant it….

  • J_Doe5686

    He’s so cute it’s almost a crime.

    • Jenni

      Careful, he’ll have you killed for accusing him of just about anything.

    • Charles

      And you are stupid as so, the royals despise worshipers- plebs like you

    • J_Doe5686

      I’m not a “pleb” Charles. I’m not from the UK and even if I were I don’t consider them as having more power or of more value than me because they have a royal title. I just said that a baby is cute. Build a bridge and get over it.

  • Lindsey Conklin

    HES THE CUTEST BABY EVER

    • Jenni

      I would KILL to be able to pull off overalls like him.

    • Charls

      And you are the dumpest commenter ever, wait till he grows and your kid has to serve him, but I guess you will be the happiest in that case

  • Kate

    That chubby little face would make me abdicate in favor of him in a hot second

    • Erin

      Ha! Same here.

  • Erin

    I cannot get over his cheeks.

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    like Timothy implied I cannot believe that someone able to earn $7050 in 4 weeks on the internet . visit this web-site…………..

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  • M_G

    Quick! Someone get the rights to Alve and Paige’s story! I smell a summer blockbuster! Of course, we’ll have to use famous babies for the movie…..anyone know if Blue Ivy and North West have availability in their schedules for this?

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  • Guest

    A Red Wedding in his future?

  • http://wtfihaveakid.blogspot.ca/ jendra_berri

    Oh, little George is such a little nugget! Babies can be so violent and self-serving :D
    I unabashedly love the royal baby.

  • Kay_Sue

    So basically he acted like a perfectly normal baby his age? Good to know…

  • Lackadaisical

    I believe I may have spotted the problem. One of those girls was named Paige, which is obviously pronounced the same way as a page, a type of servant. Obviously his poor little lordship was confused after a hard day being royal and when confronted with peasant children, one of whom was referred to as a type of servant, he thought they were there for him to order around.

    That or grown ups with a chip on their shoulder are assigning a personality to a baby who is far too young to have revealed/developed those particular personality traits just because he acted like babies everywhere, and the jounos at People ignored the minor fact that all babies have yet to grasp social nicities and assume the world revolves about them.

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