• Tue, Mar 25 - 11:33 am ET

Justin Bieber And Selena Gomez Need To Stop Sexting Each Other Via Social Media

Selena Gomez gazing at Justin Bieber in Instagram photo January 2014I have a new theory that Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez don’t actually have cell phones.

I know it sounds crazy, but think about it —  they’re always using social media to get in contact with each other. They post a video of themselves together when they fire their relationship up again, Justin posts a photo of Selena in a gown to let us know that he thinks she’s an ‘elegant princess’, this is like their thing.

And even though they did have that one back-and-forth on their cell phones where Selena was trying to have a fight and Justin was trying to send her dick pics, it didn’t seem like it went that well, so it doesn’t surprise me that Justin returned to Instagram last night to tell Selena the entire word that he loves it when they’re ‘lovey dovey’. BLEGH.

Call me crazy, but I feel like there are other ways to get a photo to someone. All sorts of apps whose entire function is to deliver photos to only one person instead of millions. You could use one of those to communicate with Selena, Justin! Or at least tag her in this one, y’know?

It’s just that the way you did it, I don’t even think you’d notice if she’d favorited the picture, because there are 896k followers who had the exact same idea.

Bottom line, these two mongrels can communicate in any way they see fit. I don’t mean to judge that. I’m just nervous that things are gonna escalate, because apparently one of the ways that Jelena keeps things spicy is by sexy-Skyping and sexting.

“He gets plenty from her and has a slew of pictures, and videos with her that would make the internet explode. He gets all the important stuff.”

And with the way things are going with Selena’s nude pic and Justin’s poor tattoo-based decision making, I’m just worried that the two of them might accidentally go public with this. And that will be something that I won’t be able to wash off my brain or my eyes or my anything. Shivers.

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  • Kaitlin Reilly

    Everything about Jelena just makes me sad.

  • gdhh

    Is it just me or does he look like he got high, then ate some realllly bad Thai food and decided to take a photo of a futile fight against constipation??

    • Alexis Rhiannon

      That’s not just you. It’s fact.

  • Pumba

    Justin Bieber and Selena are always on this ‘crushable’ and they always just dis them i think the ppl that run ‘crushable’ r just h8ers bcoz it is none of our business how they communicate and btw he is beautiful sexy gorgeous and makes all his beliebers happy and u shld get ova this lil 5 yr old h8 and move on! LEAVE THEM ALONE THEY R BOTH AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • FemelleChevalier

      We got a live one here, folks! WHERE’S THE HARPOON?!

  • Pingback: Selena Gomez And Justin Bieber Are Maybe Getting Married, So Let's Write Their Vows - Crushable