Justin Bieber’s Newest Tattoo Is Right By His Happy Trail, Which Is Convenient Because They’re Both Embarrassing

Justin Bieber showing off new tattoos and happy trail on flight March 2014I understand that Justin Bieber is running out of space on his body for tattoos, but I really think he should’ve waited for a few more wisps of hair sprout up on his tiny boy-body before he got inked anywhere near the happy trail region.

But as always, Bieber didn’t take my advice, and proudly lifts his shirt in new photos to show off the word ‘forgive’, tattooed disturbingly close to his crotchal zone, which, yes, is the scientific term. But why would you need that word there? Is it an apology for his almost complete lack of body hair? An attempt to make the Miami Police’s documentation of his tattoos out-of-date pretty much as soon as they recorded it? An early excuse for whatever his peen gets up to for anyone doing a pre-beej circle of the area? It could be literally anything.

It’s also not even the only tattoo that Justin got during that session, as he also got a cross right smack dab in the middle of his chest. (The meaning of that one is much more clear — it’s obviously a reminder that no matter how silly we think Bieber looks, he can always look sillier.) And because Justin is just a crazy kid who doesn’t like to do anything in a normal place, he got both of these tattoos aboard his private jet, while flying from Panama to Canada on January 28th. You know, because when your only job is to get arrested in as many cities as possible, sometimes you need to fly around the world at 40,000 feet for no reason, trying to set a world record for highest-altitude tattoo.

Both masterpieces were done by Bang Bang, who I’m sure spent so much time staring at that pathetic thatch of pubes that he could clear it up for us whether the total number of hairs down there is twenty-eight or twenty-nine. I’ve got money riding on it.

(Photo: Coleman-Rayner via BangBangTattoos’ Facebook)

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    • Olivia Wilson

      It is definitely 25 and Beiber’s camp padded the number to make him seem more mature. Classic Hollywood.

      • Alexis Rhiannon

        Yeah his IMDb page is nothing but overestimates.

    • Samantha Escobar

      I try so hard not to be judgey about other people’s tattoos but in the Biebs’ case, my judgement will never cease.

      • Alexis Rhiannon

        Never change, Sam.

      • Samantha Escobar

        If I do, will you…forgive me?

      • Samantha Escobar

        That comment makes more sense if you could see see me pointing at Justin Bieber’s stomach.

    • Lindsey Conklin

      Ew that picture is grossing me out. he needs to put his shirt down

      • Alexis Rhiannon

        That statement is always true.

      • Madison

        he’s a male. males have their shirts off here and there. he’s doing it for the picture. why is it such a huge deal?! gosh you people make a huge deal over absolutely nothing… good lck going to the beach and seeing shirtless men walking around all day

      • Alexis Rhiannon

        Did you just invite me to the beach? Great! What time works for you? I’ll pack a lunch.

    • NeuroNerd

      Maybe this is freudian, but I totally read that as “fugitive”.

      • Alexis Rhiannon

        Haaaaaa! Perfect.

    • The Great Seymour(Butz)

      he got this tattoo on his jet..he’s lucky they didn’t hit any turbulence or the tattoo might have read “Forgiveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee”

      • Alexis Rhiannon

        FORGIVE MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

    • Madison

      “but as always, bieber didn’t take my advice.” i hate how you say that, because who are you to tell him what to do with his life? the person who wrote this is a low-life nobody who rants about what HE/SHE wants celebrites to do with their lives. and how does it effect you!!?? these media writers are the most immature people i’ve ever encountered. you should be ashamed of who you are and what you do to these people’s lives.

      • Alexis Rhiannon

        If you truly don’t have the tools to figure out whether I’m a male or a female, you have bigger problems than this article.

    • Madison

      your tattoos look good justin. it’s your body and if that’s what you want to do with it, that’s perfectly ok. don’t listen to these assholes, they have no right to tell you what to do. they’re just trying to make something out of nothing because they have no excitement in their lives.

      • Alexis Rhiannon

        Today I stepped on a banana peel!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • FemelleChevalier

      Celebrities are awful at choosing tattoos. If you’re going to get inked, at least get something epic. Like a bionic arm for a tattoo sleeve. Or Pokémons.

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