• Mon, Mar 10 - 2:29 pm ET

Justin Bieber Calls Selena Gomez His Baby, Which Is Ironic Because He’s The One Who Wears Diaper Pants

selena gomez talks pain

It’s looking more and more likely that Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez are getting back together. So please, take a moment to look at where you are right now and what you’re doing. Because in 50 years when your kids ask you where you were when romance officially died, you’ll be able to answer truthfully. While we’ve seen this reunion coming for weeks now, it’s still pretty upsetting to watch it go down. Say what you want about Selena Gomez (and we’ve said it!), but it’s undeniable that she’s an emerging star. He, on the other hand, is a garbage person. No, based on today’s released deposition video, I’ll say that he’s lower than a garbage person. He’s the person who wear’s the garbage person’s hand-me-downs. Which are made of garbage.

While I’ll admit that this video from SXSW doesn’t prove that they’re officially dating again, it’s certainly damaging evidence. You don’t just walk around (or slouch around in Justin’s case) calling your ex-girlfriend your baby if she’s not. Then again, this is the same human being who sent out the cryptic princess Instagram message about Selena last week. So perhaps I’m giving his thought process too much credit. He could be delusional enough to think once someone’s your baby, she’s always your baby. I mean that’s how his life’s worked so far. Once he wore diapers, now he always wears diapers.

However what makes me think that this isn’t all a delusional moment caught on camera is the fact that the two did get spotted hanging out in Austin, Texas this weekend. Which means you can stop holding your breath that Selena Gomez would come to her senses and cut off all contact with this garbage clown once and for all. And yes, Justin Bieber did get demoted from garbage person to garbage clown in the time it took you to read this.

(GIF: Tumblr)

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  • Jill O’Rourke

    Ugh, these two.

  • AEM

    I’m completely exasperated. After this, I really feel Selena’s friendship with Taylor is cooling off. They’re still BFFs, but NOT “current” BFFs. This is like Taylor/Emma Stone and Selena/Vanessa Hudgens. Taylor and Selena still have each other’s back, but Taylor rather hang out with Lorde/Jaime King/Karlie Kloss than listen to Selena whine about Justin.
    If Sel/JB want to make the relationship work, they need to disappear from the limelight and work exclusively on being together. This way, they can remove all the external forces (tabloids, media) from the equation. They need to go “all in” in the relationship, instead of this start/stop mess.

    • Jenni

      I’m sure the closer Selena gets to Justin again, the more Taylor’s team is like stay away. Also, she’s been traded out for Lorde, her new favorite shiny toy friend.

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