The 10 Most Famous Models Ever To Fail Epically At Acting

Tyra Banks as Eve in Life Size (2000) GIF(via)

The Face returns tonight with the premiere of its second season, and if you’re anything like me, just admit that you’ll be tuning in.

After all, is there anything more entertaining than models on television or in movies? Their whole lives and careers are dedicated to looking good in front of the cameras, with notttt all that much attention paid to learning how to sound good in front of them. Modeling is for sure a skill, and once that I undeniably don’t have for many many reasons, but just having a pretty face does not an actor or a TV personality make.

Or at least that’s what I’ve discovered in my tireless treks through the crappy movies that models have done while dipping their (dainty) big toes into the acting pool.There are some real gems out there you guys…more than I’d even remembered. And since movies are forever, these particular treasures will serve as a tireless reminder forevermore to these models that it’s not quite time to quit their day jobs.

1. Heidi Klum

Let me just say first of all, that Heidi does an excellent job of hosting Project RunwayI feel like she really has that down. But watching her film guest spots on shows like Parks and Recreation and How I Met Your Mother really make my skin crawl with sympathy pains. Just act naturally, woman! You don’t have to clench every muscle in your body all at once!

2. Erin Heatherton

When your most high-profile credit on IMDb is Grown Ups 2that’s probably a good indicator that you’re better off on the Victoria’s Secret runway. But what do I know; I’ve never dated Leonardo DiCaprio. Perhaps it’s perfect real world training for wearing a cheerleading uniform and shouting stitled lines at a car wash.

3. Tyra Banks

Oh Tyra. You are literally the poster child of this post, because you have done some seriously wacky movies. And at the top of that pile is the time you played a doll come to life. It’s a a tough day when you can’t quite pull off the role of ‘human mannequin’, wouldn’t you say?

4. Jessica Alba

I get that Jessica Alba actually is an actor, and that’s where she makes the majority of her money, but until you’ve seen Fantastic Four, you don’t get to tell me that she should be doing anything but modeling. Just to give you a little context, I couldn’t find a single collection of clips on YouTube that actually contains dialogue. It’s just her pretty little face with music in the background. Yikes.

5. Brooklyn Decker

“Here Brooklyn, can you lie on top of a man in a bikini in Battleship? One of the worst movies ever made? That is all that shall be required of you.”

6. Kate Upton

You’d be hard-pressed to find a dude who didn’t want to date her, but I’d say even harder-pressed to find an actor eager to be cast opposite her in a movie.

7. Karolina Kurkova

Karolina was such a memorable part of G.I. Joe: The Rise Of The Cobra that she doesn’t even appear in the trailer. Impressive.

8. Gisele Bundchen

Just want to point out A. that woman is a very bad cop and B. this movie (Taxi2004) was ten years ago and she’s only done a brief cameo in The Devil Wears Prada since. I’m hoping we learned our lesson.

9. Marisa Miller

I get it, Marisa. I would have signed on board immediately as well after hearing the premise of ‘cops who are actually dead cops’. How could that not be brilliant?

10. Ashton Kutcher

Annnnnd good old Ashton to round out the list. I’m very aware that he, like Jessica Alba, actually does make his money off of acting. I just don’t know that we should really be calling it that, considering he’s admitted his entire character for Jobs was just firing people and walking like he was going uphill.

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    • Lindsey Conklin

      Tyra banks “be a star” gets me every time.

    • Kaitlin Reilly

      I didn’t think that Brooklyn Decker was horrible in that “Just Go With It” (the one where Jennifer Aniston played the homely assistant, because realism) but the bar was pretty low… And Kate Upton, adorable as she may be, doesn’t look like she’s going to win an Oscar for her new movie

      • Alexis Rhiannon

        Tragedies.

      • elle

        Haha my thought process upon seeing that trailer went OMG Leslie Mann and Cameron Diaz in a movie together? About wronged woman? And the guy is GOT guy? I’ll be first in….oh Kate Upton. Well….there’s always Redbox.

      • Alexis Rhiannon

        Right? I think I felt that happen to me also! So disappointing.

    • Nancy

      I LOVED Jessica Alba in Dark Angel! And Ashton in That 70′s Show and The Butterfly Effect…. but I haven’t liked either of them in anything since.

      • Alexis Rhiannon

        I will admit to having watched THE HELL out of Dark Angel as well.

    • aCongaLine

      I’m of the belief that the only person in the contemporary history of the entertainment business that can successfully pull off acting and something else is Justin Timberlake. :)

      • Alexis Rhiannon

        I’m scanning through my brain, and so far that statement is disturbingly accurate.

        Maybe Jennifer Hudson?

      • aCongaLine

        I love Jennifer Hudson. I would agree, she wins the silver medal in multi-talent entertainment. :) And I don’t hate her face all over the weight watchers.

    • Paul Erna

      Hard to believe people fail. I mean Jim Beluchi has a bentlt http://zautos.com/used-car/for-sale/bentley/ Who was he prior to his brother?

    • Arty Cohn

      The prime example was Suzy Parker, America’s number one model, leaden performance in the 1959 movie, “Kiss them for me”, with Cary Grant.

    • Tinyfaeri

      Hey, now, don’t knock Battleship. It had corny lines and cornier jokes, cute-but-tough old people, ACDC and fighting aliens. And stuff blew up. A lot. What more can you want?

    • Me

      The name of the movie is Taxi, not Taxi Driver.

      • Alexis Rhiannon

        That is 100% correct.