Let’s all take a moment of silence to honor the passing of Hendall, that most precious of relationships between Harry Styles and Kendall Jenner. It seems like only yesterday the two of them were just starting to further each others’ careers by pretending to date, and now their fakelationship has run its course. A true tragedy.
Okay are you done mourning them now? It’s just that I only put aside a few minutes for that, and now we have to move on to bigger and better things…like setting Harry up with a brand new lady with whom to be casually spotted holding hands. And it can’t be just any lady, y’know? It has to be someone special — beautiful, funny, smart, and most importantly…low maintenance enough that she doesn’t mind not actually being in a relationship with him.
Like one of these ladies!
1. Saoirse Ronan
Saoirse is super talented, but she needs a tiny little boost to take her to the next level — just the kind of thing that could come from dating Harry. Plus she seems really low-key and relaxed, and she’s Irish, so she and Harry could compare accents.
2. Dakota Fanning
At nineteen, Dakota may be a year younger than Harry, but she’s currently dating a thirty-two year old, so Harry would be a welcome change. And regardless, I don’t think there’s a person on the planet who could intimidate Dakota, least of all Harry.
3. Suki Waterhouse
Suki already has fake-dating experience from her time with Bradley Cooper, and since she’s trying to launch an acting career out of her modeling career, the timing couldn’t be better! Plus it seems like she actually knows Harry, as the two of them sat next to each other at London Fashion Week.
4. Nina Dobrev
Yet another lady with a PR-relationship under her belt, Nina is the perfect option because Harry has already spoken publicly about having a crush on her. And if she can make it work for six weeks with Derek Hough, I can’t even imagine how convincing she’d be with Harry.
5. Ali Lohan
COME ON SHE NEEDS THIS.
6. Miley Cyrus
Wouldn’t it be nice for them each to be dating someone who could actually handle them for a change? And to be the same level of famous? I feel like there would be absolutely no romantic feelings between them, but isn’t that helpful in this type of arrangement?
7. Kate Upton
Probably the only woman on the face of the earth that Directioners wouldn’t scream at via social media if she and Harry started dating. I mean…look at her. She’s every guy’s daydream.
8. Frances Bean Cobain
As the daughter of Courtney Love and the late Kurt Cobain, Frances is a great person to date if you want to be taken a little more seriously in the music biz. Particularly if you’re about to venture out on a solo career. Cough cough.
9. Shailene Woodley
Shailene is one of the quirkier names on this list, and I feel like she and Harry would get along really well just as people. And maybe he could help her get a little more of the attention that she so greatly deserves for her strong work. (Although she’ll probably get it for herself in Divergent and The Fault In Our Stars.)
10. Shawn Johnson
An Olympic gold-medalist! Are you really gonna turn up your nose at that, Harry?!? Think of all the tales you could tell each other about being famous as teenagers! And she could prepare you for the day that people aren’t as obsessed anymore!
11. Demi Lovato
I think Demi is better than a fakelationship at this point, but I just love both of these two so much that I secretly hope they end up together and can share their intelligent, inspirational thoughts with us forever and ever amen.
12. Khloe Kardashian
C’mon, don’t try to tell me that Kris Jenner isn’t already pulling for this. Khloe and Lamar Odom are divorcing, Kendall and Harry couldn’t hack it as a couple, and Kylie Jenner‘s too young to date Harry. Khloe+Harry is the obvious choice! Think of the controversy!