14 Celebs Who Have Too Much Money For Their Own Good

Liz Lemon make it rain GIF black and white(via)

So last night was Jay Leno‘s final night on The Tonight Showwhich he tearfully left after twenty-two years and one brief hiatus, which he swiftly ended by totally dicking over Conan O’Brien. Surrounded by luminaries like Kim Kardashian(‘s ass) and Jack Black, Jay said goodbye to his life in the spotlight and hurried home to swim in his pile of money and count his cars.

Because that’s the thing about Jay — he has a shit-ton of cars. Like, way more cars than you’re even thinking. Whatever number of cars you’re imagining he has, he probably has like three or four times that. It comes out to about 190 vehicles in total, around 100 of which are cars that he likes to diddle around with on the weekend in whatever sort of Garage Mansion he’s currently residing in.

It’s cute that he has a hobby, but that’s too many, right? There comes a point where you get too much money and things start to rage out of control, and soon you’re just gobbling up every car you see, and running through your crowded garage in a daze, honking happily and running your hands over leather interiors.

Because let’s face it, guys. There is such a thing as too much money. And if you don’t believe me, take it from these celebrities who are proving it all too true every day of the week.

1. Jay Leno

Jay Leno 10th Alfred Mann Foundation Gala October 14 2013 Beverly Hills California

(Photo: WENN.com)

Estimated Net Worth: $350 million

A car for every day of the week I will accept. I GUESS. Gotta mix things up, y’know? But once you get more than that, it goes straight to your head and you drastically overstay your welcome on a late night talk show. (Just a hypothetical situation, you understand.)

2. Oprah

Oprah Winfrey SAG Awards January 18 2014 Los Angeles California(Photo: WENN.com)

Estimated Net Worth: $2.9 billion

Honestly, I’m still not convinced that Oprah doesn’t just own Chicago. You can’t even take her off the air, because she’ll just buy a television network and be on it 24/7.

3. Mitt Romney

mitt romney smug

(Image: Tumblr)

Estimated Net Worth: $250 million

And for his next trick, Mitt will alienate the electorate by not knowing how many houses he actually owns. (Although to be fair, he does know that he owns a dancing horse that went to the Olympics.)

4. Madonna

Madonna shows off her grill in Rome August 2013

(Image: Kika Press / PacificCoastNews.com)

Estimated Net Worth: $1 billion

When you’re fifty-five years old and sporting a solid gold grill with diamonds in it, that should be an indicator that it’s time to pump the brakes on earning money and maybe go into retirement. But Madonna can’t stop won’t stop until she can physically buy eternal youth. Keep at it, lady!

5. Simon Cowell

Simon Cowell attending X Factor season three premiere party September 2013

(Image: Brian To / WENN.com)

Estimated Net Worth: $400 million

I guess when you own every single talent show that finds its way to television and invent the money machine that is One Direction, you start to think it’s okay to wear sunglasses indoors, keep yourself flush in deep Vs, and put sperm in the wife of your best friend. That all adds up.

6. Jay Z and Beyonce

Jay Z lifting up Beyonce in black and white photo December 2013

(Photo: Tumblr)

Estimated Net Worth: $850 million

Remember that thing where their daughter Blue Ivy has a nursery at the Barclay’s Center and Jay bought Bey an island? TOO MUCH.

7. Ryan Seacrest

Ryan Seacrest Julianne Hough Promise 2011 Gala Los Angeles California September 27 2011

(Photo: WENN.com)

Estimated Net Worth: $250 million

Madonna probably wants to talk to Ryan, actually, because he seems to have located the fountain of youth. Must be nice to be so rich that when you and a (rumored) contracted girlfriend split, you can afford to just throw a break-up mansion her way.

8. Courteney Cox

Courteney Cox attending Los Angeles Museum opening night party May 2013(Photo: Ryan / WENN.com)

Estimated Net Worth: $75 million

Her numbers might not be up quite as high as the rest of the group, but just think how wonderful Courteney’s face would look if she had slightly less money and couldn’t afford to get a new surgery approximately every day.

9. Johnny Depp

Johnny Depp World Premiere of The Tourist December 6 2010 New York City NY(Photo: WENN.com)

Estimated Net Worth: $350 million

Johnny also owns his own island, and is so filled to the brim with money that he has a gun collection, a bug collection, and a fake mustache collection. I guess in retrospect it’s still better than cars, right?

10. Lena Dunham

Lena Dunham pigeon on her head vogue magazine(Photo: Vogue)

Estimated Net Worth: $10 million

Again, doesn’t sound like that much — until she starts trying to be relatable in Girls and fails utterly. Your money’s getting in the way of your art, gal.

11. Mariah Carey

Mariah Carey attending the Screen Actors Guild awards (SAG) January 2014(Photo: Brian To / WENN.com)

Estimated Net Worth: $510 million

On some level, you have to respect a woman who’s able to pay someone to follow her around with an umbrella over her head and catch her gum in their hand when she’s ready to spit it out. But on the other hand — no you don’t at all because that’s absurd.

12. Michael Jackson

michael_jackson_-_another_part_of_me3-640x480(Photo: WENN.com)

Estimated Net Worth: $600 million

I mean all due respect, because the guy’s dead, but he had a Peter Pan themed amusement park at his house. And he bought himself a new face. And he used to pay a doctor to essentially euthanize him every night and then wake him up in the morning. There is such a thing as too much money.

13. Justin Bieber

Justin Bieber attending opening of Believe December 2013

(Photo: Apega / WENN.com)

Estimated Net Worth: $160 million

Do I even need to explain this one? The kid has built himself an insulated bubble of money, and every time he goes outside of it, which is a lot, he gets arrested. I think he’s so rich he forgot what real life is.

14. Jerry Seinfeld

Jerry Seinfeld stand-up Jimmy Fallon June 2013Estimated Net Worth: $800 million

I think making a ton of money in comedy is really dangerous, because it distances you from the things you found funny in the first place and makes you unlikely to be able to connect to your audiences in the way you used to. Cough cough Jerry.

Share This Post:
    • Jill O’Rourke

      Oh my God, does Johnny wear the fake mustaches out?! Has he fooled us all?!

    • Kelly17

      I’m really surprised at how much Jerry is worth but I love Lena! She deserves every penny

    • Misenhammer

      JUSTIN BEIBER IS THAT RICH???

      Uuuuuuuuugh

      • Alexis Rhiannon

        Right??

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    • Dee

      Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban

    • J_Doe5686

      Oprah has worked so hard for her money!

    • Pingback: 14 Celebrities Who Are Way Too Rich For Their Own Good Lead The Daily Links |Parkkar Lifestyles and News

    • normalgal

      Our family of six lived on 26, 000 last year. These people could misplace that much every year and never even know. Excessive and a little sad. I know people who struggle and work ( labor) for their money and at the end of the day it doesn’t cover the bills. :(

      • Alexis Rhiannon

        Great point.

    • ValdaDeDieu

      Can we do something? Can we stop calling people who’ve worked HARD for their money “celebrities” –like they’re animals in a zoo– and stop saying they HAVE too much money? When you’ve worked for your money, how much is too much? Is there a point at which you say, “Look, I’ve been paid so much already; I’ll do this part for free?” If so, when do YOU– i.e. writer of this blog– begin to say so? #FAIL

      Limitation is a state of mind.

      • Elizabeth Aspen

        In total agreement on people who have actual talent. Anything named Kardashian doesn’t fall into that category.

      • Alexis Rhiannon

        I promise I’ll stop writing when I make my first million, how about that?

      • ValdaDeDieu

        Keep writing crap and you won’t. (But hold your breath; you can but dream….)

    • Elizabeth Aspen

      Alexis Rhiannon, you lost all credibility when you brought Courtney Cox’ looks into it. Says a lot about your own insecurity when you criticize another person’s appearance.

      • Alexis Rhiannon

        I always prefer when celebrities age naturally instead of turning to plastic surgery, and I will continue to stand behind that.