If I could be one person in Hollywood, it might very well be Sarah Silverman. She has the qualities I spend nights awake in bed thinking about, the best being the “couldn’t care less” attitude. Sarah only becomes more awesome to me when she shows up to a fancy event dressed down, and everyone looks at her with a questioning look (which is really the ultimate sign of jealousy, right?). I also wish I could say sexual and obscene things around the dinner table and have my mother laugh hysterically — opposed to the ‘I failed as a mother’ look I get now.
She’s unapologetic, rash and tells it like it is. Just look at the above GIF for proof. While I don’t think I would ever repeat anything she says out loud, (although I might think it), here are 7 of her best jokes to get you ready for her appearance on tonight’s Watch What Happens Live. Between Andy Cohen’s intimate questions and Sarah’s complete lack of a filter, I’d bet a small car she’ll say some things that could be added to this list.
1. Sarah’s F*@#ing Matt Damon
Remember when she was dating Jimmy Kimmel, and would go on his show all the time? Even though they’ve broken up, she’s still returned as a guest, taking ‘let’s stay friends’ to a whole new level.
2. Sarah Dedicates Her Show To Her Nana
Sarah is so nice that she dedicated one of her shows to her recently-passed away G-ma. Well, not really so nice after you see what she says.
3. Sarah Wears A Moustache
Sarah will do anything for a laugh, as evidenced by her choice in the above clip.
4. Sarah Is Visited By Jesus Christ
Did I mention that Sarah constantly chimes in on controversial issues? We’re 100 percent pro-choice here at Crushable, so we love when she makes people talk. But she definitely got some haters by bringing Jesus into her discussion.
5. Sarah Loves Cheese
Perhaps I’m naturally drawn to Sarah’s humor because of our mutual admiration for the greatest food on the planet. While I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t take this love to the place she does, you have to appreciate her for her passion.
6. Sarah’s iPhone Trick
When Sarah’s on a late night talk show, you know she’ll be even more raunchy than usual. Watch this video and prove me right!
7. Sarah Makes Fun Of Paris Hilton
Sarah wouldn’t be a true comic if she didn’t comment on the OG of turning a sex tape into celebrity. While it’s nice to see that Sarah has feelings, the most important takeaway from this clip is that you can’t care too much about someone as awful as Paris Hilton.