Kim Kardashian posted a new photo to Instagram yesterday of her baby daughter North West sitting in a chair with her older cousin Penelope Disick, daughter of Kourtney Kardashian and Scott Disick. Kim captioned the photo “BFF’S,” but I happen to have a fake college degree in pretending I’m a body language expert, so I think I know what’s really going on in this image. Clearly Penelope Disick is now raising North West as her own. Let’s face it, we all saw this coming from a mile away.
While Kanye West and Kim Kardashian are busy standing in front of a mirror practicing their scowls or finding the perfect angle for ass selfies, respectively, someone has to look after the baby. That someone is obviously Penelope Disick. When you think about it, she’s actually super qualified. She’s almost a year older than little Nori, so she knows the ways of the Kardashians enough to be a mentor. Much like Yoda, very wise and knowledgeable she is. Penelope can tell Nori not to bother Grandma when she’s taking her daily money bath, to just smile and nod when Harry Styles and Kendall Jenner pretend to be dating, and to hide her over-the-top eyeroll when the family pretends Keek is a thing.
Just look at the way Penelope holds North in her wittle baby arms. I bet she’s already perfected the “No photo!” arm gesture for when she and North go out on the town. One day a TV movie will be made about their relationship (Kris Jenner will soon be champing at the bit to sell the rights), and it will be called The Baby Who Raised That Other Baby While The Other Baby’s Parents Were Busy Being Narcissists: The North West And Penelope Disick Story. We can always shorten the title later, but either way I’m thinking Tori Spelling and Jennie Garth will star in it, and yes I mean as the babies. Who else would they play?