Welcome to Myrtle Manor premiered its second season on TLC last night. It feels like forever since I’ve been able to spend time in that trailer park. To give you a quick refresher of what happened at the end of last season, Chelsey and Jared got married in a weirdly beautiful ceremony, and Myrtle Manor’s owner Cecil decided to
not do anything because he was never going to sell the park in the first place not sell the park. If you thought last season seemed a little bit — how you say? — not realistic, then you won’t be surprised to hear that this season feels even more — how you say? — fake.
But as I established last season, I’m not watching this show for the realism; I’m watching it to be entertained. In that regard the premiere certainly delivered, mostly because I felt like I was watching a ’90s sitcom rerun, which is one of my favorite things. There were so many plots this episode that felt ripped from the pages of a half-hour comedy. Why do I say it felt specifically like a ’90s sitcom? Because there were just so many mix-ups and shenanigans. Mix-ups and shenanigans are so ’90s, aren’t they? In order to properly express the uncanny resemblance, I decided to just list every time I felt like I was watching TBS on a weekday afternoon.
- Cecil decides to go on a vacation and leaves his daughter Becky in charge of the park while he’s gone. Obviously they all decide to throw a big Fourth of July party while he’s away. Remember to clean up those red cups before he gets back, guys.
- Chelsey is supporting Jared financially while he works on his “passion,” music. He also consults Amanda about how to cook. Classic lazy husband storyline.
- Becky’s childhood rival Roxanne runs a competing trailer park in Myrtle Beach, because OF COURSE SHE DOES.
- The residents suspect that their mysterious new neighbor is a prostitute because she has men going in and out of her trailer like a clown car. I’m sure there will be some reasonable explanation and we’ll all feel so silly.
- Amanda accidentally reveals that Chelsey has been going to the aquarium every day, even though she told Jared she works at a law firm. Naturally Amanda backtracks and pretends she didn’t say that. Cue laugh track.
- Jared follows Chelsey to the aquarium when she leaves for work, thinking she’s cheating on him. All that was missing was a bouncy soundtrack over shots of him peering around corners.
- Jared discovers that Chelsey is actually working as a mermaid. In true sitcom fashion, I suspect that in the next episode they will make no mention of the mermaid job.
- Marvin decides that to impress Anne on their date he’s going to bleach his “goatstache” blond. Trying a risky new hair (or goatstache) style before an important event was like a rite of passage for ’90s sitcom characters.
- Roy leaves an invitation to the Fourth of July party on the maybe-prostitute’s door. Unfortunately she doesn’t show up, but it had the potential to be a great shenanigan.
- Miss Peggy gets drunk on Amanda’s jello shots and goes to Tangulls demanding red, white and blue hair. She’s so wasted she believes they’re actually doing it.
- Marvin spends 20 minutes trying to get his ball in the hole at mini-golf while Anne eats dinner alone. Haha, this date isn’t going as well as he thought it would! So silly.
- Rival manager Roxanne shows up with her residents on the exact same beach the Myrtle Manor folks are having their party on. Roxanne’s people also have bigger fireworks. Prediction: By season’s end they’ll make up and decide to combine parks.