No matter how fast you run, no matter how many times you play the Wicked soundtrack and do a rain dance, no matter how often you pinch yourself to wake up from the nightmare, Carly Rae Jepsen is coming for you, and she’s wearing an enormous ball gown. In case you haven’t already heard the news and taken to Twitter to express your outrage a la Sarah Hyland, allow me to remind you that Carly Rae Jepsen was recently given the lead role in Rodgers and Hammerstein’s Cinderella on Broadway. She’ll start her 12-week run on February 4th, but Carly’s already been sharing behind-the-scenes photos from the show on her social media accounts.
That includes the above photo of her in costume, which she captioned, “Literally having a ball.” Get it? Because ball. I know I should hear laughter but all I hear are the muffled screams of theater geeks the world over. Pop stars and Broadway are not always a match made in heaven, especially when the pop star in question is pretty much only known for performing the song that launched a thousand lip dub videos. She also happened to draw a very disappointing crowd at a recent Canadian mall event, which really speaks for itself.
I’d say we have another Sound of Music Live situation on our hands, but the difference here is that people were able to watch that from the comfort of their own homes for the price of their monthly cable bill, as opposed to buying a ticket and going to a theater. But maybe it’ll start a whole new trend of hate-watching Broadway shows.
We need to talk about that photo, though. Is it just me, or is she pretty much unrecognizable? It doesn’t help that it’s a full body shot that looks like it was taken through a frosty window pane, but I just don’t know how to look at Carly Rae Jepsen when she doesn’t have those bangs. It’s like, what is this strange empty space between her hairline and her eyes? Is that a forehead? No, Carly Rae Jepsen doesn’t have a forehead, you liar! Perhaps they’re trying to make her look as anti-”Call Me Maybe” as possible so people will forget who she is. Is it working, Broadway fans? Do you need some time to recover from this trauma?