When she wasn’t using North West as a human ring holder, Kim Kardashian spent New Year’s skiing on the Utah slopes. Naturally there is plenty of documentation on the Kardashian family’s Keek accounts. As you may or may not know, Keek is a thing, kind of like Vine, that allows you to post short videos. The Kardashians are obsessed with it, to the point where it almost seems like they could be getting paid for it. Weird.
One of the best Keeks from their trip is the one Scott Disick posted of Kim skiiing between her sister Kourtney’s legs. First Kourtney skis through Kim’s legs and manages not to get too out of control. Then Kim tries it through Kourtney’s legs. It’s like the new, kooler version of leap frog. Unfortunately Kim — who says in another Keek that she hasn’t skied in ten years — doesn’t stick the landing as well as Kourtney did. She slides right through and then can’t stop herself, finally wiping out in the snow.
If you look really closely, perhaps enhancing the Keek CSI-style, you can see the exact look Kim Kardashian will have on her face when she eventually slides off the face of the earth. It doesn’t look like that will happen any time soon, but I’m sure Kim was thoroughly terrified by this experience, as it showed her what her future will bring once she’s divorced Kanye and run out of ways to make having a baby all about her. These are dark times, my friends.
But I have to cut Kim some slack here. She hasn’t skied in a ten years. I haven’t skied in infinity years, because I’ve never skied. I also wiped out at a roller skating party as an adult, so I’m not one to judge clumsy behavior. But luckily I didn’t have my sort-of-brother-in-law film that incident and post it online using a social media service whose name sounds more and more ridiculous the more I hear it. So that’s where we differ.