• Sun, Dec 29 - 10:00 am ET

The 13 Most Controversial Crushable Articles Of 2013

Haters Gonna Hate GIF(via)

Have I ever mentioned how much I love my job? I get paid to watch TV and movies, obsess over celebrities, and then say whatever I want about them. Basically I make the kind of observations that I’d normally make for free into the ear of a friend, except I make them on the internet, and at the end of the day somebody pays me for them. Let’s ignore for a second that I’m about to use the word ‘rad’, and acknowledge that it’s pretty damn rad.

Most days. Because most days, everybody’s on the same page. You get that what we’re doing is delivering celebrity news in a package with a little more of our own personalities injected. We get to write whatever we want, and we usually don’t want to write it out the same way everyone else does. So instead of writing ‘Austin Mahone takes shirtless selfie’, we write, ‘Austin Mahone takes shirtless selfie, still refuses to acknowledge he is Justin Bieber incarnate.’ Who could be offended by that?

Well, turns out a lot of people, and stuff like that happens a surprising amount of the time, where our articles backfire. Not just with Beliebers and Mahomies, but with anyone who happens to stumble across our site and either doesn’t get the element of sarcasm or just doesn’t care for our opinions. And even though it kind of sucks to be raged at by commenters in situations like that, it does create some pretttttttty interesting dialogues, that I thought I’d share with you, since the year is almost out. So here they are, comrades, in no particular order — The Most Controversial Crushable Articles Of 2013. 

Feel free to, um…tell us what you think.

1. Nina Dobrev And Derek Hough Are Pretending To Date Each Other, How Cute

Nina Dobrev and Derek Hough dating September 2013(Image: Adriana M. Barraza / WENN.com, Josiah True / WENN.com)

When Nina Dobrev and Derek Hough started ‘dating’, I pointed it out as a probable fakelationship right away, on account of the extremely prevalent rumor that Derek is gay. (According to blind gossip, he’s who Ryan Seacrest was actually dating while he was pretending to be dating Julianne Hough.) But you know who has a huge, angry fan base that really doesn’t want him to be gay? Dancing With The Stars‘ Derek Hough. You learn something new every day.

2. Michelle Duggar Waxes Poetic About Teaching Her Daughters To Feel Ashamed Of Their Bodies As Soon As Possible

The Duggar Family trip to DC

(Photo: DLC, TLC)

Oh man, The Duggars. Talk about a can of worms. They’re a family of fundamentalist Christians who are the stars of the TLC show 19 Kids And Counting because, as I’m sure you put together, they have nineteen kids and don’t seem extra-likely to stop there. They also have a lot of ideas about how you should raise your kids, including teaching them that birth control is bad, abortion is like the Holocaust, and that wearing pants makes you a whore. Oh and their fans really don’t like Jenni, because she disagrees on all those counts.

3. These Photos Lea Michele Posted Will Make You Buy Into The Fakelationship Rumors

Lea Michele put up some sexy photos advertising her upcoming album just three months after the tragic death of Cory Monteith, and I shared my personal opinions on that. Namely that someone going right back into self-promotion right after the death of someone they were supposedly close to getting engaged to made me uncomfortable, and led me to buy into the fakelationship rumors about these two. And boy did people (somewhat understandably) not like that.

4. Annnd The Jennifer Lawrence Backlash Begins, Which Means That It’s Time For Her To Go MIA

Jennifer Lawrence Interview Yay

(via)

Jenni noticed that there was some backlash about Jennifer Lawrence starting up, just like there had been for Anne Hathaway last year. Turns out people aren’t quite ready to talk about that yet.

5. Paul Walker Was Wrong To Date A 16-Year Old…And I Know That From Experience

Paul Walker and his girlfriend Jasmine in Hawaii in 2009

(Photo: Will Binns / Pacific Coast News)

After the shocking death of Paul Walker, we discovered that he’d started dating his girlfriend of seven years when he was thirty-three and she was just sixteen. I felt like it was possible to discuss an important issue like statutory rape separately from the tragedy of his death, but over thirteen hundred comments on that post alone suggest that most readers disagreed with me.

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  • G.E. Phillips

    I just did a drive by on the Demi/Selena one, and wow. I hope all those kids put that much energy into their schoolwork.

    • Alexis Rhiannon

      Hahaha yeah, seriously.

  • CMJ

    Sometimes, I am amazed by the trolls that come out of the woodwork for some of these posts.

    • Jenni

      It never ceases to amaze me how much people care about celebrities who don’t know they exist. Defend them all the live long day, but it won’t matter to them.

    • http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

      Are you including yourself by writing about them? Jes askin’

    • Jenni

      I’ve never issued death threats to someone because of their feelings toward a celebrity, so no.

    • http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

      I don’t see anything about death threats. When did that come up?

    • Jenni

      I promise that if you read the articles, the commenting section will be much more valuable to you!

    • http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

      I DID! Is it in teeny tiny light gray print?