• Thu, Dec 19 - 11:00 am ET

Heidi Klum Got Six Christmas Trees This Year, Is Officially Addicted To The Holidays

Heidi Klum in the middle of Christmas trees Instagram photo November 2013 I need to draw your attention to a pressing issue in the celebrity world you guys: Heidi Klum might be struggling with addiction. And not to anything you’re used to like drugs or alcohol — to holidays.

She’s already proven that she’s in real deep with Halloween, creating progressively more intense costumes every year, and now she’s gotten hooked on Christmas as well, buying six Christmas trees this season. SIX. That’s an obvious cry for help and a clear-cut example of holiday-overdose, but here’s what she told People Magazine:

“This year for the first time [the kids] each have their own tree in their room. That’s a lot of trees, I know. They were taking photos of us when we left the lot, and they were like, ‘Oh my gosh, they’ve got the whole forest!’ But it’s because I have so many kids!”

Okay girl, you can blame it on your four kids all you want, but I see what’s really happening here. You got your tolerance up with Halloween, and now you’re mainlining Yule straight into your veins.

We should be glad that it’s not drugs or alcohol, but holiday overdosing is just as dangerous, you guys, and it’s no way to live. For a while it’s nothing but hot cider and cheer, but soon all the glitz and glamour will wear away and it’ll just be Heidi sneaking downstairs in the middle of the night to feverishly chew evergreen branches to get her Christmas fix.

And one day that won’t be enough either, and she’ll find herself sneaking the trees into bed with her and neglecting her family to direct all her energy to bringing more and more holiday spirit into her life. And one day you wake up and you’re living the rest of your life in a snow globe. I’ve seen it happen before and I’ll see it happen again. Such a tragedy.

Heidi Klum's mom putting the star on her Christmas tree Instagram photo December 2013

She at least knows better than to expose herself directly to anything Christmas-themed, like pine needles, as she let her  mom put the star on top of one of the trees, captioning the above photo ‘Mom is the best :)’.

It’s a step in the right direction, but you need to stay safe out there, Heidi. The first step is admitting you have a problem, and you certainly want to try to get it under control before Valentine’s Day, because I don’t know what the going rate is for cherubs right now, but i bet they don’t come cheap.

(Photos: Instagram)

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  • Jill O’Rourke

    I like to imagine Halloweeny Heidi Klum walking around the Christmas tree lot singing “What’s This?” from The Nightmare Before Christmas.

  • Meredith Hirt

    I heard she tried to quit her addiction cold turkey at Thanksgiving (ha) but it clearly didn’t work.

    • Alexis Rhiannon

      Ziiiiing.