• Wed, Dec 18 - 11:58 am ET

Ryan Gosling And Eva Mendes Are On A Break, Clearly Unaware Of How Important Looks Are In A Relationship

Ryan Gosling Eva Mendes DatingDespite hearing rumors for months that Ryan Gosling and Eva Mendes are breaking-up, it, I refused to accept the truth. How could two people so beautiful and so glamorous possibly be unhappy with each other? Seriously, picture yourself waking up to either of those flawless faces in the morning and being upset with them. “Ugh, honey, turn away from me. I’m so incredibly sick of your face’s perfect symmetry. And that body. That stupidly amazing body. You make me sick. Just straight up ill. Get away, get away right now!” You can’t imagine that because it’s impossible. Straight up scientifically impossible. Unless you’re Eva Mendes or Ryan Gosling and you’re valuing your own happiness over your partner’s looks. Sure I’ve heard of people who know people who know people who do this. But until right now, I couldn’t fathom it being a real thing.

But according to the fine folks at Radar Online, it does appear to be the case.

The 2 Fast 2 Furious actress and The Notebook hunk haven’t officially split, but, “there was a realization before Thanksgiving that they took things way too fast and were rushing toward a marriage that neither of them particularly needed,” a source told Radar.

It also appears that they’ve haven’t checked Ryan’s IMDB since 2004. The Notebook hunk? Really? Why not just call him the Mickey Mouse Club alum while you’re at it? Also hunk? Which reporter just got defrosted from the ’80s and brought back to life? Am I right or am I right or am I bitter because I’ve found out for the umpteenth time this year that love is dead.

Anyways Radar goes on to say that Eva wanted Ryan’s babies (like, no duh) and Ryan did not want to give them to her. At least at the moment. While this is all still pure speculation I do have to go ahead and applaud both of them for making what sounds like a mature decision. I feel like the new Hollywood trend is to have babies first, then talk about if it’s a good idea later. When the kids are like five or six, young enough to be confused but old enough to read the tabloid headlines in the supermarket. So I guess good job Ryan and Eva? Way to be more mature and less shallow than everyone you work with out there in Hollywood.

Also Ryan, I may or may definitely know someone who’s into being the rebound girlfriend. And she may or may definitely share my identity soooooo I’ll just leave that fun fact there and let you make the first move.

(Photo: PacificCoastNews.com)

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  • Olivia Wilson

    I imagined Ryan Gosling having a collection of babies (not unlike a U.S. coin collection) and Eva demanding that he give them to her, but him refusing. That could be wrong, but I’m pretty sure that’s what actually happened.

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