• Wed, Dec 11 - 4:10 pm ET

Everything You Need To Know About The Harry Styles December 7th Conspiracy Theory

harry styles red carpet

There’s nothing more exciting in the entire world than celebrity conspiracy theories. NOTHING. From whispers of Illuminati connections to surrogacy rumors to fullblown fakelationships, I love it all. Or I should say, I’m IN love with it all. If celebrity conspiracy theories grew arms, legs and enough cognition to recognize that a woman should make as much money as a man, I’d marry them.

But my love life’s neither here nor there right now. Today we’re talking about Harry Styles, December 7th and everything in between. Earlier this week we discussed the fact that Harry Styles continues to enter into relationships that he’s far too good to be. People toss around all kinds of ideas about upcoming albums, proposed reality shows and even his sexuality. But like the money in the middle of the table at the end of a large group meal, none of it adds up.

Well, what we’re about to discuss today won’t clear anything up about this fakelationships. In fact, it will only complicate things further. Much further. But that’s okay. Because once we lay all the facts on the table, we’ll able to start figuring things out. It’s like a puzzle, but more exciting because we’re playing with people’s lives.

So with no further ado, let me introduce you to The Harry Styles December 7th Conspiracy Theory.

Yes, you read that right. Harry Styles stepped out of a hotel with a woman for the past 3 years on the exact same day — December 7th, for those of you who are slow on the uptake. First Caroline Flack in 2011, then Taylor Swift in 2012 and finally, Kendall Jenner in 2013. What does it mean? Everything. Also nothing. While it could easily be a hint about a worldwide conspiracy that will slowly unravel and reveal the truth about who really runs the world, it could also just be a coincidence. Or even more depressing, an inside joke between his publicists. “Let’s mess with his fans,” they probably cackle as they make the hotel reservations, “they’ll make something out of nothing.”

In grand conspiracy theory conclusion, be on your guard. Anything’s possible here. Nothing’s too wild for your imagination — so let it run wild. Preferably in the comments section.

P.S – same place, same time, same discussion next December 7th?

(GIF: Tumblr)

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  • Jill O’Rourke

    Oh my god, is Pearl Harbor involved? What is this?!

    • Jenni

      I wasn’t going to go there, but I was obviously hoping someone would.

  • My View

    These things didn’t ‘begin’ on these dates but what is interesting is how the same dates have been targeted to pursue the idea of being seen going into/out of the hotels of these women and suggests a cosy relationship between press and PR to me! All these supposed relationships have ended very shortly afterwards as well. I’m telling you, there’s more to this than meets the eye and anyone squealing ‘unfair!’ is just being totally naive. And also chewing too hard on their One Direction duvet covers. If Harry Styles was so head over heels with Taylor and Caroline, and spent all his time pining for them and buying rings and talking babies with them (as we’re led to think) why doesn’t it last? Ever? Why can’t just one of these dreamy, adorable relationships ever stick? Why does he need a new girl every week? This week, it’s three girls all at the same time (Daisy Lowe, Kara Marshall and Kendall Jenner). Are we supposed to believe all 3 girls would put up with this crap on a regular basis? Please, world, this is PR at it’s most arrogant.
    I’ll tell you why. These groups are set up to dupe young girls into the idea of her fantasy prince being available. That so many girls want to ‘mother’ and ‘defend’ Harry Styles to the point of assuming any alternative opinion is negative/dissent is just another manifestation of clever marketing. This kid could be running with wolves in his spare time and his fanbase would be clueless! Always keep an open mind.

  • Jen

    I’m so sick of the word “conspiracy”. Obviously the dates wouldn’t look sketchy if the relationships weren’t even sketchier. Noone needs to solve or speculate anything, admit it’s sketchy and move on rather than making fun of fans.

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  • Directioner

    Love Harry to death #Directioner Maybe he gets a discount on these days, going cheap for the cheap girls:)

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