I’m sorry, but there’s no point in sending out your Christmas cards this year. Not after Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi debuted theirs on the The Ellen Show. There’s also not really a point in decorating your house or trimming your Christmas tree. At least if you’re in competition with humanity to win Christmas. Because as you probably read above, Ellen and Portia just won. First place, second place and even third place. The honorable mention’s still up in the air, but there’s a good chance that’s going to them too.
Between their absolutely perfect Kimye “Bound” tribute and that fact that I’d like to marry both of them, it’s undeniable that this card’s the best thing ever. Better than Seth Rogen and James Franco’s “Bound” parody? No. But only because they’re in two completely different categories. Seth and James playfully poked fun at the couple. Ellen and Portia are clearly paying respect to the motorcycle ride that changed everything. Even, according to the way Kim’s hair is blowing in the video, the way wind works.
In case the above photo’s not enough to convince you that they won Christmas, check out the video of Ellen explaining the card below. And then take down the Christmas tree, because there’s really no point in even trying anymore. Unless of course you’re not into it to win it — and are just getting your house all gussied up for the spirit of the season. Which I’ve heard through unnamed sources (fine, elves) is possible.