There’s a rumor going around this week that Kelly Clarkson’s brand spanking new husband’s cheating on her. Which would be a damn shame because they not only JUST got married, but they also just announced that they’re expecting a baby. There’s never a good time to cheat on your wife. But doing it when you’re newlyweds with a baby on the way seems like an extra bad time. I would say that it’s right in between cheating on a spouse recently diagnosed with a terminal illness and cheating with Leann Rimes on my list of worst cheating scenarios.
The good news is that the original story originated on a site calledÂ The Dirty. So there’s definitely a chance it’s completely made-up and we’re stressing over this for nothing. (Ya’ll are stressed, right?) It comes from a lady who prefers to remain anonymous. Which means she’s googleableÂ or Â completely made-up. So with that in mind, here’s what she has to say about her affair with Brandon Blackstock:
Brandon has been cheating on Kelly (with me) for the past 5 months. We met at a golf club in TN and have exchanged multiple texts and hung out a few times over the last little while. Because his parents are music royalty, Brandon really thinks he is invincible and better than everyone else. I donâ€™t even know why Iâ€™m saying any of this since my story isnâ€™t that juicy. We havenâ€™t slept together but weâ€™ve been intimate in other ways. I really hope his wife keeps her eye on him because heâ€™s not the great man that she thinks he is.
Okay first of all, let’s pretend that Mrs. Anonymous is real. Then let’s give her a reality check. Instead of putting the responsibility on Kelly Clarkson, how about she stops doing “intimate things” with a married man. Seems unfair to blame the one person who has NO idea that it’s happening.
Second of all, if myÂ husband cheated one me I would blast some Kelly Clarkson and then Lorena Bobbitt the shit out of him. But that’s just me. I watch a lot of melodramtic movies and shows that make maiming bad guys seem like the moral thing to do. And I have a healthy amount of Kelly Clarkson songs ready to go on my phone at any moment. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve blasted “What Doesn’t Kill You Makes You Stronger,” to get through a bad day. Okay, fine you win, I’ll tell you. 406 times. Once for every time someone broke my heart and once for every time I raced home to watch a show and it was a rerun. I think every living human being knows the pain of an unexpected rerun! #AllTheUghs
While I’m not sure if it would be weird for Kelly Clarkson to blast her own music if she found out that her husband cheated on her, I wouldn’t judge her for it. But let’s hope that this is all made-up and she can keep on going on talks shows and waxing poetic about her new little family.