• Tue, Nov 26 - 12:47 pm ET

Turns Out Even Rihanna’s Own Mother Has Been Pronouncing Her Name Wrong

Rihanna What's My Name GIF(via)

Are you guys ready to get the pop culture rug ripped out from under your trendy little toes? To become aware that everything you thought you knew and believed in and hung all your hopes on is a LIE? (I hope so, because it’s the week of Thanksgiving, and literally nothing else is going on with these famous humans.)

Well ready or not, here comes the big news — we’ve all been mispronouncing Rihanna‘s name. All of us. We’re just a big pile of idiots acting like we know what we’re doing, and then we open our mouths and nonsense garbage flies out. This is unbelievable.

You’ve been saying ree-AH-na, right? Of course you have, because we’re all members of a pack of wild animals, squawking out new names for people we don’t understand. It’s pronounced ree-ANNA, for the love of god. REE-ANNA. When you really think about it, we’re no better than Ryan Seacrest renaming Quvenzhané Wallis ‘Little Q’ during Oscar season last year, because the real pronunciation of her name was too intimidating for his delicate radio sensibilities.

But just how high up does this conspiracy go? How many people are there out there blindly mispronouncing her name when a simple YouTube video of Rihanna introducing herself at a concert (if she ever gets to one on time) would end the speculation once and for all? Answer: a lot of them, and it’s a group the includes professional abomination Chris Brown (no surprise there), Jay Z, and even Rihanna’s own mother, Monica Braithwaite.

OH THE INDIGNITY — wait. Rihanna’s mom says it wrong? How is that possible? She’s the one who named her, anyway: Robyn Rihanna Fenty, so if someone’s wrong in this situation, isn’t it more likely that it’s Rihanna herself? As Gawker points out, she does have an entire song dedicated to asking what her own name is, called, fittingly ‘What’s My Name?’ with new/old boyfriend Drake. I thought the question was rhetorical or I would’ve given her a call.

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  • Jill O’Rourke

    If she wants us to get her name right, she should work harder to get ours right. My name isn’t Na Na, Rihanna! It’s Jill!

    • Alexis Rhiannon

      Zing!

  • Olivia Wilson

    It’s so hilarious just watching her face as she hears someone say it the wrong way. It’s like “ugh, not again.”

    • Meredith Hirt

      Why has she let this go on so long? Like Alexis, I too thought What’s My Name? was rhetorical. She did not make that clear! I know her sexual preferences (thanks to S&M) better than I know her name.

    • Alexis Rhiannon

      We have all been betrayed.

    • Alexis Rhiannon

      If you can’t take the heat, get out of the kitchen.
      Or rename the kitchen.

    • Olivia Wilson

      Or perhaps change the pronunciation to Kitchanne, so no one will know how to say it.

  • Amanda Lee

    Nope. I will always call her Ri-Ahna. Sounds way better and it fits her more I think.

    • Alexis Rhiannon

      I think if every human on earth and her mom agree, then she’s outvoted.

  • Jay Dee

    I’ve always pronounced it ree-anna but I thought that was just my british accent…

  • FauxRealFaux

    Drake and Rihanna make such a cute couple.

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