Before I show you this GIF, I have to ask you something — have you eaten recently? Or had pleasant feelings about food? Or wished to eat ever again in the future of the world? If you answered yes to any of those questions, then you probably don’t want any part of the image that’s lurking further down in this post.
The same thing goes for your enjoyment of the holiday of Thanksgiving. If you like turkey or pilgrims or family or love or being thankful, this article is not the place for you, because I’m about to destroy all that. I’m about to ruin Turkey Day for you in a way that I haven’t since I made that terrible batch of stuffing that I’m still hearing about from all my friends I made taste it.
THIS IS YOUR FINAL WARNING. Ahead there be demons, and they wear the face of Miley Cyrus. And yes, there is twerking. Because of course there is. And you might think you’re ready, but you’re not. You’re really not. In the ten minutes since I’ve shown it to my coworkers, I’ve collected the following words about it — ‘distressing’, ‘traumatic’, ‘oh man’, ‘noooo’ and ‘eesh’, as well as several full sentences like ‘I am still not over it’ and ‘that will haunt my dreams’. Are you ready? Okay. Here you go.
I am sorry. I am so so so so sorry. Although not as sorry as I should be, because A. I can’t stop watching it, and B. I just shared it with all of you. It’s just that Logo TV (the people who made this GIF) have created the most perfectly horrifying thing ever, so I had to give it its platform. Every dog must have its day, y’know? Even when it’s a naked raw turkey shaking it’s turkey tail at you. Ugh you guys. I can’t. I don’t know how to feel right now and I can’t stop grimacing.