For some reason that I can’t figure out, Austin Mahone is still denying that he and Justin Bieber are exactly the same person. Even though there’s proof. The truth will come out sooner or later — that Austin lives inside Justin’s body and comes out at night while Bieber is all tuckered out from something like a romp with a maybe-prostitute – so I guess I might as well be patient and wait for their cover to be blown.
But until then, let’s listen to Austin talk about how it feels to be compared to Justin Bieber, and pretend that every single link in their genetic code isn’t identical. Here’s what he said to E! Online in a recent interview:
“It’s definitely flattering. But, I just want people to give me a chance to let me show them I am different and I am my own person.”
Okay yeah yeah yeah yeah, sure. You two may still go by different names and be two years apart and whatnot, but are we really supposed to sit here and pretend that Austin isn’t following Justin’s exact career path, move by move? What exactly is so different between the two of you? I know Mahomies hate it whenever I imply that these two are twinsies separated at birth, but you can’t deny that Austin’s life is a shot-for-shot remake of Justin’s. You just can’t.
You both started out small, with a dedicated, cleverly-named fan base to yell at anyone who insults you, and a nice floopy hairstyle. Then you blow up, and you’re just regular-famous for a while, but as your voice drops and you become a less talented singer, you gotta distract from that by exposing your scrawny body more and more and bragging about muscles that you only vaguely have. Once you’ve achieved that, start styling your hair in a pompadour, wearing sunglasses inside, and covering yourself in tattoos before descending full-tilt into the world of drug rumors, erratic behavior at concerts, ill-advised hookups, and generally terrible life choices.
You have so much ahead of you, Austin! And the sooner you admit that you’re Bieber 2.0, the better for everyone.
(Image: Dennis Van Tine / Future Image / WENN.com)